When it All Comes Crashing Down
by csiphile
Summary: Sara's stalker strikes again as Grissom and Sara start to move forward. Sequel to Fear, you need to read that to understand this one.
1. Default Chapter

Title: When it all Comes Crashing Down (Sequel to Fear)  
  
Author: CSIphile/Stepf  
  
Rating: PG13  
  
Disclaimers: I do not own them. Because if I did, all the shippers would be happy. They are the sole property of Zuicker and Crew.  
  
Summary: Joey Harrington strikes again as Grissom and Sara move forward.  
  
Notes: This is another long one guys, hope Joey and I haven't overstayed our welcome. I'm already writing chapter 21 as I start to post. This is a tough one to write for reasons that will become clear in about..4 paragraphs. Hope y'all don't hate what I did. Just saying. Also you NEED to have read Fear to understand this, otherwise you'll be going 'Huh?' a lot.  
  
Thanks: To a fabulous beta Adina (DCChick), a fabulous person, helpful beta and humor co-author (not this fic, there is no humor to be found.well a little, but not much). You rock girl, you cant even imagine. Dev and Meg..I love you ladies. They held my hand when I almost file 13'ed this bad boy. And they both put up with my never ending whining about this fic. They are saints.  
  
  
  
She looks down at the small piece of plastic and frowns. 'What did I do wrong?' she thinks while chewing on her lower lip. Grabbing the directions sitting next to her she reads them again, double-checking that she followed the steps correctly. Panic starts to settle in. Her rational mind telling her it's right, it can't be anything else, and it's a chemical reaction for God's sake. The rest of her brain, however, says no, she must have done something wrong; she can't have gotten this result.  
  
"Its not rocket science, Sidle. Either its there or its not. If Grissom could see you now, checking the directions over and over he would laugh." she says aloud to no one, her voice reverberating in the small tiled room.  
  
Abandoning her work, she walks into the kitchen and pulls the calendar off the wall. Thinking hard, Sara flips the pages back, one, then two, then three months. 'How? How could it possibly have been that long ago? How did I not notice until now?' but promptly answers herself aloud.  
  
"Harrington, stress. That's how. Oh my god." Sara leans against the counter for support, unsure of what to think or what to do. It's not everyday you find out you're pregnant. Staying in the denial stage a bit longer, Sara walks back into the bathroom and looks again at the thin white stick. Two lines. Two lines means pregnant. She picks up the stick like she would a corrosive substance, as if handling it will cause her to become pregnant if she's not already.  
  
Going into her day planner, Sara flips through the pages until she finds the number she needs. Picking up her cell phone off the coffee table, she puts down the test and sighs. 'Can't hurt to call,' she reasons and dials the number, getting an answer on the second ring.  
  
"Associates in OB/GYN."  
  
'Well, how do you start this conversation?' she wonders for a moment. "Yeah, hi. I'm a patient there and well.I took a pregnancy test and it's positive. There's no chance its...wrong.is there?"  
  
"Not likely," replies the nurse. "Usually the tests give more false negatives than positives. Congratulations, you're pregnant. What's your name, so I can pull your file?"  
  
Sara is stunned, the doctor's office was her last hope to find out she isn't. "Uhhh.Sidle, Sara Sidle."  
  
"Ok, Sara. Give me one minute."  
  
Sara is put on hold, elevator music playing in the background, but she barely hears it. All of her thoughts are jumbled and confused. She should be happy, right? Or not, because she and Grissom had never really discussed this? What is the correct emotion for this moment? She seems to touch on every possible one in the two minutes she is on hold.  
  
"Sara? Ok, when was your last period?"  
  
"Ummm.Aug 20th, give or take, I don't really keep very good track."  
  
Sara hears her typing in the background. "Ok, normally you come in at 8 weeks, but you are right now at.yikes, thirteen. So let's get you in as soon as possible, you need to get on prenatals and talk to a doctor. We have an opening tomorrow at noon, how's that?"  
  
"Yeah, that's fine. Thanks." Now she's shaking. Tomorrow? She'll have to tell Grissom today, which kind of takes away the option of pretending this isn't happening.  
  
"Ok, Sara. We will see you tomorrow at noon, the father is encouraged to come. And congratulations again."  
  
"Ok. Thank you."  
  
She hangs up the phone and sets it carefully back on the table. Walking around the coffee table, she sits heavily on the couch. Slowly, Sara looks around the room: Grissom's living room; she still can't handle going back to her own apartment for any length of time. Despite the fact she was attacked here, the emotional response is still at her apartment, which she can't understand. She had asked her therapist, Elizabeth about it one day, during her infrequent sessions. Elizabeth explained Sara could distance herself from Grissom's place psychologically, Sara perceived the violation to be not of her, but of her things, which, for Sara is harder to deal with. So her apartment, her things cause her to remember Harrington more than Grissom's do.  
  
Grissom, god. What will he think of this? Not once had the topic of children come up, it had been too early in their relationship. Taking a deep breath, Sara lays out on the couch, propping her head up with a pillow she had forced Grissom to buy not so long ago. Watching the kitchen clock, she counts down until Grissom will be home. Two hours, two hours for her to sort this out. She doesn't have a choice about having it or not at this point. Thirteen weeks is too far along to not have it.  
  
Staring at her still flat abdomen, she takes the time to catalogue her emotions: fear, a lot of fear, panic, is she capable of handling a baby, a small person dependent on her. Besides, Sara can admit she isn't exactly the motherly type, her job and personality see to that. Sara knows she is still in the slow, painful process of recovering from Harrington. What kind of toll will a pregnancy have on her? Physically she has recovered just fine; last week the cast was removed from her arm and her lung has completely healed. But pregnancy can bring with it emotional highs and lows, and she still needs to see the psychologist every few weeks. Her thoughts briefly turn to the few moments of hell when she considered killing herself. Could that happen again? She knew some mothers had serious depression with pregnancy.  
  
'Good thing I haven't been taking those anti-depressants. God knows what may have happened to the baby,' she thinks.  
  
"Baby," she says the word aloud. It has an odd ring to it when she hears it in her own voice. Biting her lower lip Sara tries to consider the good things about having a baby, someone to help grow and guide and mold. Someone who loves you unconditionally, someone to follow in her and Grissom's footsteps: to be a scientist, to make a difference in the world. Grinning now, she places one hand lightly over her stomach, imagining that she can feel it.  
  
Sara evaluates her reasons for never wanting a child. After considering and dismissing several theories, she finally hits on the one that instinctively she knows is correct: she had simply never found anyone with whom she wanted to have a child, no one who could match her intelligence, dedication and passion. But now she had found that person. Together they had created something unbelievable, life. The scientist in her had to appreciate that she is her own experiment. Suddenly the prospect of having a baby isn't as scary.  
  
Checking the time again, Sara sits up quickly; she has been sitting there thinking for over an hour, and it is her turn to get breakfast ready. Sara slices fruit; she is starting to come to terms with the idea of being pregnant, the hard part is going to be telling Grissom.  
  
Grissom opens the front door to a sight he never gets tired of. Sara, standing at the counter, slicing fruit with the omelet pan heating behind her. Every time it was her turn to cook breakfast she made omelets, vegetarian for herself and turkey for him. He remembers the first time she made them, only a week after Harrington attacked her in his house. Sara has a bad rap for cooking, but a secret only he knows is that she makes a killer omelet. That first taste of one was magnificent; he couldn't have done better himself.  
  
Hanging up his coat and placing his briefcase by the computer he walks into the kitchen and wraps his arms around her waist. He watches as she slices like a professional, each piece of fruit the same as the one before, her long slim fingers working quickly and efficiently, getting the most out of each movement. Kissing her temple, Grissom releases her and turns to wash his hands, her silence is not unusual, but something seems off to him. While rinsing the soap from his hands Grissom considers a thought he has been having for the past week or so, something he isn't sure Sara will go for. Sticking his tongue out, he purses his lips and decides to come right out and say it. It will be easier that way, like ripping off a band aid.  
  
"Sara, I've been thinking." He waits for the brunette to turn from her preparations. When she doesn't, however, he lightly grasps her arms and turns her. Even now he is mindful of how he touches her, not wanting to trigger a memory. When he has her attention, Grissom starts again. "Sara, I've been thinking, why don't you move in with me? Permanently."  
  
He watches her face carefully and for one moment swears he sees the color drain from it. When she doesn't answer for what seems like an eternity, he quickly starts talking again.  
  
"You spend all of your time here, you only go to your apartment to pick stuff up." He stammers for a moment before speaking from the heart instead of his rational brain. "I want you here, Sara. I want to share my life with you, and that includes my personal space. I love having you here, this was always a house to me, with you it's a home."  
  
She smiles at him; it's a different smile than he has seen before. This one has some kind of mystery to it. "Gris..oh wow. I.don't know what to say."  
  
"How about a yes or no?" He is taunting her a bit.  
  
"Sorry! I would love too." She is now grinning from ear to ear, exposing the gap in her teeth he loves so much.  
  
"Good, well, that was easier than I was expecting."  
  
"What where you expecting? You're right, I never stay at my apartment, the plant is here already. What else do I need?" Sara slides up to him and wraps arms around his neck. Sara almost can't think, she had always known they would be together, and this is just the next step.  
  
"We don't have to stay here you know. It's big enough for the two of us that's for sure, but we can move to a different place."  
  
Sara swallows hard, she had almost forgotten about the secret she is carrying. Finally what he asked he really sinks in. That he asked her to live with him before she told him about the baby, calms Sara's now on edge nerves. What makes her the most nervous is that for once she doesn't know what Grissom will think. Usually she can anticipate his feelings; she knows him better than she knows herself. Taking a deep breath Sara pulls away and looks in his eyes, he is so happy right now she can see it in his eyes, will what she tells him destroy that and what they have? Sara doubts that, Grissom is a good man, a loving man, but a man ready to be a father at 46? That she doesn't know.  
  
'Damn it Sara, just spit it out. Like ripping off a band aid,' she tells herself.  
  
tbc........ 


	2. Chapter 2

Title: When it All Comes Crashing Down  
  
Author: CSIphile/Stepf  
  
Notes: No Joey in sight yet and I'll tell y'all it will be a little bit yet before everyone's favorite stalker/QB makes an appearance. I gotta give the geeks some time. I'm not that cruel. Yet. Heh.  
  
And sorry guys I forgot to timeframe this for you in the first chapter. It picks up about 11 weeks after Fear ended. Right before thanksgiving. The next few chapters will help clear the time up for you I think.  
  
Thanks: Thank you to those who have reviewed, I appreciate it to no end. Really. I was a bit nervous about this whole scenario, but it seems to be working so far. So thank you and keep it up, it keeps me writing.  
  
  
  
  
  
"Grissom, I need to tell you something."  
  
Clearing her throat, Sara sees the fear in his eyes; conversations started this way usually aren't good for him. "This is hard, really hard and I understand if you."  
  
"Sara! What is it?"  
  
"I'm pregnant," she says, and almost cringes waiting for his reaction.  
  
Shocked by her words, he releases the light grasp he has on her arms and takes a small step back.  
  
"You're..pregnant? Are you sure?" he asks. His tone indescribable to her, the look on his face is one of confusion.  
  
"Yes, Gris. I'm sure. I wouldn't have told you if I wasn't." Her tone is tense, on the verge of defensive.  
  
Grissom immediately picks up on her agitation and smiles at her. "Sorry, that was a stupid question. Come here." He grabs her gently by the hands and guides her into the living room, sitting them down on the couch.  
  
"Grissom, you're scaring me." Sara looks at her lap and rubs her palms together, unsure what his next words will be. Before he can start to speak, however, her small voice cuts through the silence, "I know this is a shock to say the least, and we've never discussed having children.."  
  
"Sara, before you continue. Yes, it's a shock, a huge one. This is a life altering event; I'm confused and unsure. I don't want to scare you, but I need some time to think. Can you understand that?" He asks and smoothes down some of her errant hairs.  
  
Swallowing, Sara considers what he said, and recalls the hour she spent coming to terms with what this means for them. "Yeah, I can understand. I just.I need your support right now; I need you to tell me that everything will be ok. That WE will be ok."  
  
"I can tell you right now that we will be ok, Sara. I love you and whatever decision we make will be the right one for us." Leaning back into the couch, he pulls her with him, so her back is pressed into his chest.  
  
"Well that's the thing Gris. We don't have a choice; it's been made for us," she pauses briefly and takes a deep breath. "I'm thirteen weeks, Grissom."  
  
If her telling him she was pregnant was a shock, this information stunned him. "I'm sorry? You're over three months along?"  
  
"Yeah, I called my doctors office; they gave me a general idea. I have an appointment tomorrow at noon." Sara is surprised when Grissom's strong arms wrap around her shoulders, pulling her into his warm body.  
  
"Well then, I suppose I don't have much to think about do I? We're going to be parents in 6 months." His tone is light, but underlying that she can hear some apprehension.  
  
"Grissom, that's really not the problem though. We can be parents and not be together, we can be parents together and hate each other. I don't want that to happen, but I don't want to force you into something."  
  
"Sara, before you told me about this I asked you to move in with me. That's a commitment, one that I am serious about. You aren't forcing me into something."  
  
He stops talking briefly before whispering in her ear, "And I could never hate you, never."  
  
"No. But you could grow to resent me and this baby."  
  
"Sara, are you trying to push me away from you? Because it won't work, I am here for you, no matter what. It's not just your baby, I am half that child's genetic code."  
  
He pulls her tighter into him, trying to picture in his head what a fetus about 13 weeks gestation looks like. "God Sara, what's inside you, what we made, it's incredible. Yes, it's something I never expected and something that I was perfectly happy without, but now that I know I will be a father, the idea isn't as terrifying as I imagined."  
  
She turns in place and looks at him, seeing no signs of him humoring her; he is serious.  
  
"Doesn't this terrify you in the least? Cause it does me. I have not one clue what to do with a baby, how to raise one, anything. A baby is something other people have, not me."  
  
"Oh I'm scared, Sara, don't get me wrong there. But no parents know what they are doing at first."  
  
"But Grissom, come on. This kid is so screwed with us as parents. Two anti- social workaholics who would rather read up on the latest in DNA analysis than..how to deal with your newborn or.whatever!"  
  
"Your newborns.whatever?" he questions, laughing lightly at her expression of confusion.  
  
"See the problem here Grissom? I don't even know what questions to ask." She gives him a small frown of frustration.  
  
"Sara, its ok. We can learn, we may be workaholics, but we are also highly intelligent people who can learn. I think Catherine may be a valuable asset at this point."  
  
"Holy shit, Grissom: work. I hadn't even considered that."  
  
"Let's not ok? Why don't we eat and get some sleep and discuss more later, after your doctor's appointment tomorrow. For now we keep this to ourselves."  
  
"Grissom, I love you, you know that. But this will change us forever."  
  
"I know that, Sara. You are the only person I would have considered having my child. I never wanted or had one because you the right person wasn't in the picture. You're the right person. It might take some time adjusting to the idea, but maybe it's a good change." He kisses the top of her head, a small smile escaping his lips. Every word he said was true, somehow the idea of Sara having his baby was a pleasant one, even if unexpected and unplanned.  
  
He looks over at her for what seems like the hundredth time that morning. Taking in her form, still slim, her body shows no signs of what is going on inside. He thinks back and tries to remember if she had any of the symptoms of early pregnancy. She had been extremely tired for a while and he recalls her being nauseous a few times, but never actually sick. Both symptoms he had attributed to the pain medication and exhaustion. Watching her pour two cups of coffee Grissom almost laughs out loud when Sara brings her mug to her lips and upon tasting the bitter liquid, scrunches her nose and sighs loudly.  
  
"I probably can't drink coffee. Can I?" She turns to him and narrows her eyes at his wide smile. "What's so funny?"  
  
"Nothing. No you probably can't, but I doubt one cup will hurt." He continues to smile at her, his eyes unconsciously moving to her stomach.  
  
Sara watches in silence as his eyes roam down, relieved that he seems to be happy about the baby. Grissom again tries to picture his son or daughter but can't seem to get it right. He has no clue what a human fetus looks like at this age, he knows approximately what has developed, there are fingers and toes, the brain has started to form connections. Ask him the gestational stages of a bowfly or a Dendroctus Tetrebans, that he can tell you without thinking. The size and weight of a human baby is a mystery to him. When she turns from him to pour her coffee in the sink, his concentration is broken.  
  
"Well regardless, I'll wait until I see the doctor tomorrow. I'm going to sleep a few hours before work. You coming?" She waits as he nods and walks into the bedroom, quickly stripping off her clothes and getting in bed in just her underwear. He follows and as their usual custom he curls up behind her, pulling her a little more tightly into his body than usual.  
  
"Gris?" her voice comes out of the dark, somewhat shaky.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"You sure about this? I mean, I guess I was expecting a different reaction."  
  
"Like what?" He leans in and kisses her exposed neck, sending shivers down her back.  
  
"I don't really know I guess. We had never discussed this.ever and I assumed that children were just not in the picture. With our jobs, lifestyle, and admit it Grissom, 46 isn't the optimal age to start a family. I suppose I was expecting you to be more hesitant maybe, confused, concerned, hell.pissed even. But you accepted it, why?"  
  
"Sara I was surprised and shocked. But because its you." Is all he says and she nods slightly, understanding. If she had told this to anyone else, all of those emotions and feelings would have applied. Since it was Grissom, however, it was a whole different ball game.  
  
Arriving at work that night, Grissom tries not to be overly protective and territorial, but even the best intentions often fall short. Grabbing the assignments, he quickly realizes they are all majors, not one minor to give Sara. Without even realizing it Grissom had assumed that Sara would take only the minor cases; it wasn't even conscious thought, it was instinct.  
  
"Ok guys, two homicides tonight. Catherine and Warrick, take the one in Henderson. Nicky and I will take the one at MGM."  
  
With that he hands out the sheets, not noticing the strange looks from his colleagues. Catherine snaps her gum loudly to get his attention.  
  
"What?"  
  
Nick watches as Sara shoots Grissom daggers from the other side of the table. He's not sure exactly what's going on, but Nick's positive that he doesn't want to be there when it all breaks down. He looks back and forth between the two, Grissom still oblivious and focused on Catherine, Sara giving him a hard look.  
  
"Hello.I am here tonight. Or have you forgotten already we drove in together?" Sara finally speaks, her voice tight.  
  
"Sorry, Sara. I need you to dig up information on our vic. Here's the name, get everything you can."  
  
"You want me to WHAT? Why am I not going to the crime scene?" The others watch in amused fascination as Grissom backs up as Sara stands.  
  
"Because I need you here," he states, simply refusing to acknowledge to her, or himself for that matter, why he's keeping her out of the field.  
  
"Oh no. You are not pulling that with me Gris. I have always gone to scenes with you before I do research. Why." She stops mid-sentence and her eyes narrow to small slits, the brown and black almost indistinguishable from each other. "You chauvinistic." Before she can continue, he cuts her off with a hand in the air.  
  
"How about if we discuss this elsewhere?" He asks and grasps her upper arm, carefully leading her into the empty hallway.  
  
Warrick and Catherine briefly glance at each other before settling both their curious gazes on Nick.  
  
"Why y'all looking at me like that? I don't know., he says and raises his hands.  
  
The three turn to look at the couple still standing the hallway, it doesn't appear that much headway has been made. Sara is gesturing wildly, with Grissom trying his best to calm her.  
  
"Sara. I'm sorry, I should have known better. I just don't want anything to happen to you or." He looks around to be sure no one is in earshot before continuing. ".or the baby."  
  
She sighs before speaking, bringing her anger into check. He is only trying, however misguided, to protect her. "Grissom, we will be fine. Today is no different then yesterday regarding this job. I'll avoid anything I think may do harm and I doubt luminol will hurt me. I've been working while pregnant until now; the only difference is that now I know."  
  
"But that's just it Sara, you need to be more careful, and if you have come in contact with something you shouldn't have, do you want to make it worse? Plus, I am sure Holly Gribbs thought it was another night on the job too."  
  
Shaking her head, she touches his arm lightly. "Gris it's fine, I'll always go out with someone, ok? And as for chemicals, the damage is done. There's nothing we can do about it now, but I'll be more cautious. Besides, if I suddenly stop going to scenes, don't you think a certain three colleagues will get suspicious? Tomorrow I'll ask the doctor."  
  
"Ok, you're with me and Nick then. And not so long from now, they are going to know anyway, you aren't going to be able to hide for long."  
  
He smiles and reaches out to touch her belly, but pulls his hand back just short of its destination.  
  
Catherine watches Sara and Grissom as the boys talk loudly about the upcoming Lions' Thanksgiving game. Only catching a word here or there, she watches as Sara and Grissom seem to sort our their differences. Something is decidedly different about the two, they have never gotten into it like that at work before, at least not in the open. Putting it out of her head for the moment she turns to Warrick and taps him on the shoulder.  
  
"C'mon, we have a scene to get to."  
  
"Yeah, ok Cath. Talk to you later, Nick."  
  
He punches the younger man lightly on the shoulder and follows Catherine into the hall, nodding at Grissom and Sara as he walks past, noticing that they seem to have resolved their issue.  
  
Warrick takes a few long strides and easily catches Catherine who appears to be lost in thought.  
  
"Any idea what that was about?" he asks and hooks a thumb over his shoulder.  
  
"No, I have no idea." She responds without looking, a small grin on her face.  
  
tbc.......... 


	3. Chapter 3

Title: When It All Comes Crashing Down  
  
Author: Stepf  
  
Disclaimers; I do not own them, cause if I did.whooo boy, JF would probably quit after all the crap I put Sara through. Additionally, and for the 26th time, just to cover my arse, while there is a Joey Harrington in real life, my Joey is completely made up.  
  
Notes: I don't have any.seriously. It's a short chapter, and if you review enough, you might get another one.  
  
Thanks: Always to the readers, a fabulous group. My beta Adina who inspires me to write better.  
  
  
  
  
  
'What the hell is wrong with these two?' Nicky wonders as he watches Sara take pictures of the hotel room. She and Grissom had both been acting weird since the fight earlier, not post argument weird, something else. It seems to him that they are both hiding something; whatever it is, it has both of them in an odd mood, and he is going to find out what's going on. He had already checked her left ring finger and saw nothing, but then again, Sara wouldn't wear a ring to work.  
  
Chewing on his lip as he prints the bathroom, he shakes his head and decides to simply ask Sara later. He and Sara have become as close as two people can be without actually being in a relationship. While he doesn't claim to have the deep connection she shares with Grissom: he can't read her mind or anticipate her actions like the older man can, they have something unique. Nick realizes he has never had a true friendship with a female until now.  
  
Being in the accident together cemented something for them; Sara had come to the hospital almost every day, bringing him whatever he needed, or just sitting with him, being there. After he got home, she would come over before shift for a couple hours to talk to him. At home, he was isolated, he didn't have nurses and doctors to talk to.. She usually brought food, but occasionally he cooked something easy. Until recently it was hard for him to stand for too long without his pelvis bothering him. Even now, if he moves just the right way, or pushes himself exercising a twinge of pain will remind him to slow down. They talked sometimes about nothing of consequence: the newest movie, or perhaps a journal one of them was reading. Occasionally the conversation turned more personal and in those weeks he learned things about Sara he imagines only Grissom knows. In return, however, she learned more about the Texan; he revealed to her about the babysitter, and Sara had almost cried when he told her. It had been a two way street and in the end, they both formed a bond.  
  
Smiling at the memories, he stands too quickly from the squatting position he was in and receives one of those twinges. The doctor had only cleared him to return to full duty a week ago and since then has taken every case possible. Nick hated being stuck at home, he couldn't drive and even with Sara coming over he was lonely. Nick is a people person and he needs contact to stay sane. The couple of hours he was able to put in at the lab the few weeks before coming back full time were an improvement, but honestly, one person can only stand so much of Greg Sanders before wanting to strangle him.  
  
Coming out of the bathroom, he smiles slightly at Sara and tries to hide the small limp in his step from standing.  
  
"Stood to quick, didn't you?" she says, while lining up something in the camera lens.  
  
"Might've. It'll go away. Find anything here?"  
  
"Casings on the bed, gun on the floor, should be open and shut."  
  
Turning back to taking pictures, she speaks again, this time with authority, "You really should talk to the doctor about that pain Nicky, you've been having it for a while now."  
  
"Yes, Mom." He accents the 'mom' and is surprised when Sara's head snaps around at him, a stricken expression on her face.  
  
"What?" she asks, a moment of fear taking over.  
  
"I said 'yes, Mom.' As in I'm an adult... What?" he says, confusion evident in his tone and face.  
  
"Nothing, sorry. I just worry." She covers quickly and turns back to the photographing. Luckily, she knows Grissom is working on the hallway cameras, and missed the entire exchange.  
  
"Thanks," Nick says. "But it's fine, a little stretching and the pain goes away. You almost done?"  
  
"Yep, two more pictures." She quickly snaps off the photos and turns to him, ".and I'm done. Lets pack up and head to the lab."  
  
Quietly they gather their kits and catch up with Grissom in the lobby, talking to a security guard. As they approach he turns to them and smiles at Sara before a frown replaces it.  
  
"You get everything?" he asks.  
  
"Yup, this is an easy one. Wife shot the husband after she finds out he's been sleeping around, she shoots him on vacation at that," Nick responds quickly.  
  
"Ok, lets pack it up."  
  
Two hours later Sara appears in his doorway, a brown file folder in her hands and a smile on her face.  
  
"Hey, here's the final on the MGM shooting. Just need you to sign it."  
  
She places the folder on his desk and turns to leave.  
  
He watches her turn but before she can open the door calls out to her. "Sara?"  
  
"Yeah?" She pauses, her hand on the doorknob, body twisted to him.  
  
"Can you...feel it?" he asks almost hesitantly.  
  
She smiles slightly at him. "No, Gris. I can't feel it yet, I think it's a bit early."  
  
"Ok, see you later. Where are you off to?"  
  
"I figured I would see if Catherine and Warrick need help. If not, then I guess cold cases or bother Greg."  
  
She shrugs, Sara is good at finding something to do when a case is finished and there isn't another one waiting.  
  
"Why don't you go home?" he suggests, hoping she doesn't fly off the handle like earlier.  
  
"I'm good Gris, really. It's only another three hours. Hopefully we wont get a case before it's time to leave."  
  
"Well if there is, your not going on it; you need to go to the doctor. Even I know you need to get some prenatal care, since you're already so far along. I'm sure you should be taking vitamins, at least."  
  
She raises one eyebrow at him, impressed with his sudden, if minimal, knowledge of pregnancy. "Yeah, I know. Ok, no more cases for me tonight, but I'm not going home, not without you."  
  
"Agreed. Go find Cath."  
  
"Bye," she says and exits the office, leaving him in peace.  
  
Watching her walk down the hall through the glass, Grissom opens his laptop and brings up a search engine. He plans to be prepared for that morning.  
  
tbc...... 


	4. Chapter 4

Title: When it All Comes Crashing Down  
  
Author: Stepf/CSIphile  
  
Notes: How did Gris and Sara find themselves in this predicament? All the answers are here, and its pretty sugary, you are warned, be sure to brush your teeth after. But alas.no Joey. Hey, I gotta give the geeks some alone time. Sorry for the long time between posts, life's been busy and then the whole Recipe for Murder debacle. Its been tough, hopefully this will help with the G/S faith.  
  
Thanks: Thank you for the great reviews so far. Glad to see you enjoy my madness. Of course to my beta Adina, she rocks hard, yo.  
  
  
  
"Sar, you've checked the clock 5 times already in the last 10 minutes. Why are you so anxious to get out of here?" Nick asks. Sara's behavior is curious to say the least. Never in the three years of working with her has he seen Sara excited to go home. Even the past few months of seeing Grissom hasn't changed her work habits much, she still max's out on overtime and is the first one to volunteer.  
  
"Huh? Oh, no reason, just one of those days I guess." Sara shrugs and hope the vague answer is enough for him. While she feels this tugging need to tell someone besides Grissom, and Nicky would be the first person, she bites her lip. She feels safer waiting until after the doctors appointment; she needs to be sure, to confirm that this isn't some dream she is having.  
  
"One of those days? Three years Sara, three years and not once have you had 'one of those days'. What? You and Grissom have plans?" (  
  
Finally looking at him instead of the clock Sara smiles enigmatically. "Yeah, something like that."  
  
"What's going on? You guys have been acting weird all day," he presses, now concerned for his friend. "Something wrong?"  
  
Just then Grissom walks in and Sara gets up, leaning into Nick. "Nothing's wrong Nick. Don't worry." She gives him a wide smile and follows Grissom out to the Tahoe. They have three hours to kill before the appointment.  
  
Before starting the truck Grissom looks at her "Lets go out to eat. Sound good?"  
  
"Yeah, great," she responds and smiles slightly. Sara has to admit this is making her more nervous than she was expecting, although she doesn't know why.  
  
Two and a half long hours later, they are sitting in the waiting room of the doctor's office. Sara is flipping through a magazine, Fit Pregnancy, while Grissom watches the other women in the room. Most are in various stages of pregnancy, two have toddlers playing in a section reserved for them. He watches them for a bit, fascinated by their behavior, he had never really watched children, with the exception of Lindsey, but he is seeing less and less of her as she grows up. Sara's hand on his leg gets his attention and he looks at her.  
  
"Come on, they called us." She stands slowly and waits for him to do the same, watching as he gives one more glance to the children, a small smile forming on his lips.  
  
"Ok, Sara", says the doctor. "I pulled your file and from what you told us the first day of your last period was August 20th, with a regular 28 day cycle, correct?"  
  
"Yep."  
  
"Ok," the doctor says, pushing a few keys on the keyboard. "The blood test confirmed pregnancy, so based on your last period you are going to be due May 27th. Right now you are thirteen weeks along, already in your second trimester, which is good. You're past the high risk time for miscarriage and the next 3 months are the best part of pregnancy. You want to know when conception approximately was?"  
  
Glancing at Grissom she responds in the affirmative, "Sure."  
  
"Ok, let's see. Somewhere during the week of Labor Day, probably September 3rd."  
  
"You're sure, the 3rd?" she asks, her voice shaky.  
  
Grissom notices she has lost several shades of color in her face.  
  
"Sara?" he asks, unsure what the problem is, and then does a quick mental calculation in his head. "Oh god."  
  
"Something wrong?" the doctor inquires, concerned about her reaction to the news; most parents are thrilled to remember when they conceived.  
  
"The accident," she says, barely above a whisper.  
  
"The accident," he echoes somewhat louder.  
  
Seeing the fear in her eyes Grissom turns to the doctor and explains the situation to her. "That night, Sara was in a car accident, she required surgery and was sedated. Several days later she was attacked by the person who caused the accident, and again was admitted to the hospital and medicated. She was on antibiotics and pain meds for two weeks and then just the pain medication for another two. She had two CAT scans and several x- rays for her lungs and ribs."  
  
The doctor considers this for a moment before speaking. "You were in the accident the night you conceived? You're sure?"  
  
Sara finally speaks, and Grissom can hear her trying to keep her voice from breaking, "Yes, it was the only time we slept together for a while  
  
"Ok. I can't say for sure that everything is fine. But I can tell you that many women who are on medications such as antibiotics early in pregnancy carry a healthy baby full term. I think it's a good sign you didn't miscarry, that's a strong baby you have." she looks at her notes quickly. "Well, the nurse has you scheduled for a sonogram today since this is your first visit. Lets take a look and see if everything looks good."  
  
The doctor gets up and indicates for them to follow her. Before she gets far, however, Sara asks a question. "I don't understand, I was on the pill." Sara is honestly perplexed as to how this happened.  
  
"Well, Sara, from what you have told me, you were under a lot of stress. Stress can do strange things to your body, your hormones in particular. It's happened."  
  
Sara just nods and follows her out the door, Grissom close behind.  
  
Walking down the hall, Grissom wraps one arm around her waist and whispers in her ear, "I'm sure everything is fine Sara." Sara just nods quietly.  
  
Lying back on the table in the small room, Sara gasps when the cool gel hits her bare abdomen. The doctor quickly apologizes and slides the wand through the gel, making a thin coat of it. Sara unconsciously squeezes Grissom's hand tighter as pictures start to form on the small monochrome screen. She looks, but can't see anything except snow and blobs of something. With her head turned to the monitor, Sara isn't privy to Grissom's expression when they get their first look of the baby. Slowly, the blobs had given way to shape, a small shape encased in what looks like a bubble. Sara isn't sure she is seeing correctly until the doctor moves the wand and gets a profile, the form of a baby clear as day: the head almost as big as the rest of the body, leg, arms and facial features apparent.  
  
"Is that." she starts, but is cut off.  
  
"Yep. Here's the head," the doctor freezes the picture and marks something in white. "..and here's the feet. Lets get a look here.hmmm."  
  
Sara looks at the doctor as she moves the wand more, freezing the frames on occasion. "Is.everything ok?" she asks in a small voice. Grissom has yet to speak, seeing his child, their child, is incredible. For once the master of prose has no words to describe the emotions. He didn't think happiness like this was possible.  
  
The doctor turns to them with a smile and says, "Everything looks great. He's the right size, I can see the brain and heart and some internal organs; everything looks good. You have a healthy baby Sara. Let me hook this up and we can hear the heartbeat."  
  
"He?" Grissom asks.  
  
"I call all babies he until we know, if you want to. At your 20 week ultrasound you can find out."  
  
Sara finally looks at Grissom and grins, surprised when he suddenly leans over and kisses her forehead. Pulling back he puts his lips by her ear and whispers. "I love you Sara."  
  
"You too," she responds and is about to continue when a loud, fast thubbing noise is heard in room.  
  
Looking at the monitor the doctor again smiles. "One-forty, very good strong. I like to see that. This one is a stubborn guy, he was meant to be, I guess."  
  
"Yeah," Sara says quietly.  
  
"Yeah," Grissom also responds, his exhilaration from earlier only compounded by hearing the heartbeat. Even though this is something they never planned for, it's the best thing that ever went wrong in his life.  
  
"Megan, listen. You know I have an.unusual job. How long can I continue and what is harmful to the baby?" Sara finally asks the question that is on both their minds.  
  
Sara sits up and removes the gel from her stomach as the doctor speaks, "That's tough Sara. I'm going to leave how long you work up to you for now. After about seven months though, it might get difficult to collect evidence, bending over and tying shoes is an adventure, so you may want to consider desk work after that." Grissom watches as Sara flinches at the mention of desk work. "About the nature of the job and the chemicals you use. I'm going to say that fingerprint powder and luminol is fine. A good rule of thumb is if you wouldn't want a toddler to breathe it in, you shouldn't either. I can do some research, but I don't know that I will find much. Just be aware of what you are doing. For the most part I think you are fine, though. Call me if you have any specific issues. Ok?"  
  
"Yeah, ok, thanks." Sara gets off the table and discusses with Megan about general do's and don'ts of pregnancy. As they walk out the door, Megan stops them and hands her a small envelope. At Sara's confused expression, she explains.  
  
"Pictures. For you."  
  
"Thanks."  
  
The walk out to the truck is done in silence, each contemplating the situation. It's real now, they have seen the baby, heard the heartbeat. There's no denying that by May their entire lives will change; there will be diapers, feedings, worries when you don't hear anything on the monitor, sleepless nights with a crying baby, smooth skin, smiles just for you, a first word, unconditional love.  
  
Entering the Tahoe, they look at each other. Unsure what to say. The emotional high in the doctor's office has been replaced by reality.  
  
"Well.," she starts slowly.  
  
"Well, what do we do now?" he asks, unsure what their next step will be.  
  
"I suppose we have to tell the team, and at some point Mobley is going to figure it out. I suppose we take it as it comes," she sighs loudly and opens the envelope, taking out one picture, the profile. "After that, I have no clue. I know that I have never loved someone so much before I even met them."  
  
"I have." He replies quickly and starts the Tahoe. When he sees her head snap up out of the corner of his eye he speaks again. "You."  
  
She smiles at him; he never fails to surprise her. "Well, when do you want to tell them?" They need to come up with a plan before it become apparent to everyone.  
  
"Lets give it a couple days." He pulls into traffic and heads back to his place. "Then we'll get everyone together and tell them about the baby, and moving in together, or did you forget that part?"  
  
"No, I didn't forget. I think your place is fine for now. If we have to later, we can find something bigger."  
  
"Ok," he agrees.  
  
tbc......... 


	5. Chapter 5

Title: When it All Comes Crashing Down  
  
Author: Stepf/CSIphile  
  
Notes: My bad.I'm sorry this took so long. RL has been a pain and then I got sick and..meh. So.heeeeeeeerrrrreeeesssss fic..  
  
  
  
  
  
Waking several hours later from sleep, Grissom looks at the clock and frowns: almost time for work. Rolling over, he looks at Sara, sleeping peacefully on her back, her white t-shirt bunched up under her breasts, exposing her stomach. Narrowing his eyes, he tries to see the telltale bump he is sure she will have sooner rather than later. Finding nothing, he reaches out carefully and with just his fingertips, touches her smooth skin. Feeling nothing, he places his entire palm down. He knows he can't feel anything; according to the doctor it will be several weeks before he will be privy to the moments of the baby. But for a moment, he imagines it and it's almost real. He can picture it moving and he imagines that the feeling is something similar to when a fish skims the water.  
  
Pulled out of the trance by Sara moving and making slight noises, his eyes roam up her torso, stopping at a point that holds nothing but bad memories for them both. The scar over her ribs is fading, while she will probably always have a light marking, Grissom would prefer it if the one reminder disappeared. With the cast gone, this is the last reminder for him what happened, his last reminder of a time of terror.  
  
Sara feels him touch her stomach, lay his palm down, but chooses to feign sleep for the moment, enjoying the feeling of his cool hand on her skin, letting him have his time to think. Eventually she has to move, the position she is in is becoming uncomfortable, and now she really has to go to the bathroom. He stops touching her momentarily, only to feel his fingers make contact yet again near her breast, knowing what is there. She decides that's enough there's no need to linger on the past.  
  
"Hey," she says.  
  
"Did I wake you?"  
  
"Nope, time to get up anyway." She stretches a moment, enjoying the sensation.  
  
"You need to get extra sleep now, Sara. Your typical sleep schedule isn't going to cut it."  
  
"I know, we discussed this with Megan, remember? More sleep, eating regularly, take my vitamins. I got it, really, but I'm not tired, besides we need to go to work."  
  
"Ok. I'll make some coffee, you want some?"  
  
"You know it. I get one cup a day and I'll be damned if I don't drink it!" she grins broadly at him, moving into a sitting position, when she does though, a heavy feeling settles in her bladder. "And as much as I want to stay in bed with you, I have to pee."  
  
"Uh huh."  
  
"'Uh huh', what?"  
  
"You only went 3 hours ago, I heard you."  
  
"So? Are you unclear on the whole pregnant thing all of a sudden? Cause I figured the doctors visit would help with that. PhD, my ass."  
  
He raises one eyebrow at her, her sarcasm has made a triumphant return.  
  
"I don't recall you having to urinate this frequently before you found out."  
  
She cocks her head at him in disbelief, "You're implying that my apparently sudden need to pee is psychosomatic aren't you? That the only reason I am doing it is because I know about the baby now."  
  
"I didn't say that. It's just, curious."  
  
"Don't start with me."  
  
She gives him her best attempt at an annoyed look, but has a hard time stopping a smile.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Cause I'm the pregnant one, and as such it's my right."  
  
She smiles openly now, barely managing to contain a laugh.  
  
"Uh huh. You really think I'm going to go easy on you because you're pregnant? No special favors from me, carrying my child or not."  
  
As they are talking Grissom leans into her, closing the gap between them, his blue eyes locked onto her brown ones. Biting her lower lip, Sara breaks eye contact only long enough to whisper in his ear.  
  
"I certainly hope you wouldn't. Go easy on me that is." Bringing her head back she smiles mischievously and kisses him briefly, just letting her lips brush against his.  
  
"Thought you had to pee." He replies huskily.  
  
"It can wait a little bit. I only went 3 hours ago, remember." With that she gives him a deeper kiss, pushing open his mouth with her tongue before quickly pulling back.  
  
He moans lightly when she gives him just a taste of herself. Deciding that two can play that game, he tilts his head down and kisses her in the crook of her neck, one of her sensitive spots. Feeling her shiver lightly under him, he ventures further, kissing her exposed collarbone then following her long neck up to her jaw. Stopping, he pulls away from the salty taste of her skin and looks at her, her eyes filled with want; he can feel her hands running along the waistband of his boxers, slowly inching them lower. He bends down and kisses her hard, any thoughts of going easy on her floating out of his mind with the feel of her soft lips on his.  
  
Two days before Thanksgiving, Sara moves the last of her things into Grissom's townhouse. She has given away most of her large furniture, her bed and couch the first to go. The only things she brought with her are personal items and her electronic equipment. The computer is set up in a corner; she can't live without the machine.  
  
Moving around the townhouse, Sara takes in her new space; meshing her life with his is proving more difficult than she imagined. While they are almost the same person, there are distinct differences that will have to be addressed. Something about the lack of organization in the space is making her crazy, and standing in front of the bookshelves, she resists the urge to rearrange them to her exacting standards.  
  
Grissom watches her standing in front of the bookshelves that line one wall. She is gently biting her lower lip, a look of helplessness on her face.  
  
"Sara? What are you doing?"  
  
Slowly, she turns with a guilty expression. "Nothing."  
  
He smirks at her. "I recognize that face, something is bothering you. What? This is your place too."  
  
"It's really nothing. Ok, the books, they're all over the place, not in any order. It's just me, don't worry about it. I'll deal, I need to learn to accept a little disorder before the baby comes. No problem."  
  
"Ok, as long as you are sure, cause we can."  
  
"No, Grissom. I really do need to be less controlling. Really." She smiles and places one hand on his arm. "I need to do this." Grissom nods and walks into the kitchen, watching as she gives one last glance at the shelves, makes a determined face, and steps away.  
  
tbc.....still no Joey..huh. Wonder where he could be. 


	6. Chapter 6

Title: When it All Comes Crashing Down  
  
Author: Stepf/CSIphile  
  
Notes: More fun happy geeks.enjoy it while it lasts guys. This one is kinda short, so I'll try to have another up shortly.  
  
Thanks: To Miss Din for her beta work and support. And of course to Miss Meg, who held my hand more times than I can count when I said (more than once) "Is it a little overboard to give a pregnant woman a stalker?" Apparently not, y'all seem to be enjoying, so please keep up the reviews!  
  
  
  
  
  
The Thanksgiving holiday is spent in peace. They both are at work, but surprisingly they have received not one call that night, the criminals of Las Vegas deciding to celebrate with the rest of them. Neither of them minded working when Warrick, Nick and Catherine had all asked for the night off. Sara never really celebrated the holidays, and at least she gets to spend some time at work alone with him. Well past midnight Catherine arrives with a bag in her hands.  
  
"Hey you guys! Turkey dinner coming right up." Cath flashes a smile at the pair who are sitting in the break room, looking over cold cases.  
  
"Cath, you didn't have to," Grissom replies and watches as she places the food on the table, the smell making him realize how hungry he is.  
  
"Yes, I did. I always have tonight off, it seemed like I should do something for those who must suffer in my place."  
  
After Catherine makes some small talk, she leaves the two again with their case files. Sara watches the clock tick by; she is bored, cranky and getting really tired. Without something to occupy her mind, she is going stir crazy. Additionally, the baby seems bound and determined that night to make her set a record for bathroom visits. Sighing and stretching Sara looks around the near-empty labs, Grissom had retreated to his office a while back to look for something and now she wonders what is taking so long.  
  
Standing and walking to his office, she pauses momentarily in the hall and looks back. Shivering slightly she realizes that this is the path she took in the dream so long ago, it seems so familiar, no people walking the halls, the fluorescent lighting casting a blue glow on the with tile flooring. The only thing missing is Joey and the squeaking of her shoes. Tentatively she reaches out for the door handle, rationally she knows he is fine, Harrington is locked up, but at the same time, there is fear in her stomach.  
  
Pushing open the door with ease, she sees Grissom sitting in chair, his back to her, not moving. Swallowing hard she approaches the desk, a weird terror gripping her. Finally finding her voice she calls out to him.  
  
"Grissom?" When he doesn't respond, Sara takes a deep breath and steps around the chair to face him. "Dammit Grissom!" she exclaims at him.  
  
"What?" He looks up at her, confused.  
  
"You scared me. I called your name, you didn't answer." Relief washes through her, looking in his clear blue eyes.  
  
"Sorry, distracted," he says and shows her what he had been looking at. The sonogram.  
  
She smiles at him and shakes her head at herself. She can't believe she let a dream from so long ago invade her thoughts even now. Indicating the picture she asks in a soft tone, "See something new? Or are you just trying to get a mental picture now?"  
  
Looking back down at the black and white photo, he speaks without looking up. "It's a boy."  
  
"Huh?" She looks down at the photo, she has looked at it endless times, but never noticed that. "How can you tell?"  
  
"I can't, it's just a feeling."  
  
At that she smirks, "A feeling huh? Since when do you base anything on feelings Dr. Grissom?"  
  
"I don't usually, except this one time. I just...know Sara." He shrugs and puts the photo back in his briefcase. "Can't explain it."  
  
  
  
One week later, he is watching her dress and notices a small bulge just under her belly button, not much, but enough to cause her some grief with buttoning up her jeans. Approaching her, he lays a hand on the offending bump, something that he can finally feel. Up to now, it hasn't been quite real to him, this is evidence though, proof of what the sonogram told them.  
  
"We have to tell them soon," he says.  
  
"Yeah, I know. Now I wish my pants weren't so umm...fitted. I'm going to need new clothes and I hate shopping. Oh god, Grissom, I am going to have to wear maternity clothes."  
  
He looks at her stricken expression and laughs. She only shoots him an annoyed expression and finishes dressing.  
  
Catching a glance at herself in the mirror, Sara sighs. 'A long shirt will only cover this for so long,' she thinks, and heads out the door.  
  
Entering the locker room that night, Sara is relieved to find no one in the small room. Sighing, she opens number 30, pulls her lab coat out and puts her bag on the top shelf. She creases her brow upon noticing the bag won't go all the way in; it's caught on something behind it. Reaching her hand in, Sara finds the offending item with her fingers and tugs on it; in the process, however, she catches the sleeve of her shirt on the edge of the locker, tearing a nice sized hole in it at the elbow. Pulling her arm back she swears, and looks at the damage.  
  
'Can't wear this now,' she decides and gets out the extra shirt she always has at work. Looking at the t-shirt, she realizes that it's one of her older ones, and barely hits the waistband of her hip huggers. If anyone really looked, it would be apparent what they are hiding. "Guess I'll be wearing my lab coat all night."  
  
Stripping off the ruined garment, she is pulling the new shirt over her head when Catherine's voice cuts through the room.  
  
"When were you going to tell us?" her voice is light, amused almost.  
  
'Shit, sooner rather than later, now,' she thinks and finishes dressing, deciding to play dumb for the moment. "Excuse me?"  
  
"Sara, come on. That shirt doesn't make it hard to figure out even if I hadn't seen it." Catherine opens her locker and pulls out a long sleeved red top. Sizing Sara up, she hands it over. "Here, this will cover better than what you have on. I assume you aren't telling anyone yet."  
  
"No, and we were going to tell you guys soon. We needed to adjust to it first and I guess we just wanted to enjoy it for a while, without the questions and worrying, and without the higher up finding out. This kind of goes against the whole nothing at work policy Mobley laid down."  
  
"Have you adjusted? Has Grissom?" The older woman sits down next to her.  
  
"Yeah, we both have actually. Grissom is.he's actually happy about this. I almost can't believe it."  
  
"You figured he wouldn't want anything to do with you or the baby. That he would turn away, pull back, as Grissom is want to do."  
  
"Exactly. We never planned for this Catherine, not now, not ever. It was a shock needless to say. Still is honestly. But we saw it and heard a heartbeat and it was amazing, Catherine, incredible. I never thought I would be happy about something like this, but I am. It's weird."  
  
"You've changed Sara, since you came here; you both have. Change isn't bad, it can be the best thing that ever happened to you. You've both grown, come out of your respective shells, and I think you helped each other with that. You've found your perfect mates, this is just an extension of that. Being a mother is both the most frustrating and the most rewarding experience, all at the same time, you'll see. You know why you're happy? Cause you're ready Sara, your life is where it needs to be." Catherine gets up and smiles at her. "When are you due?"  
  
"May 27th."  
  
"You better tell Nick, he'll be pissed I knew first." Catherine gives her a wink and leaves the room.  
  
Sara stands and heads to Grissom's office; it's time to tell them all.  
  
Standing in the doorway, she waits for him to get off the phone before calling his name. She watches him with a small smile on her face, her life had made a complete one-eighty in the span of six months. She had gone from the most terrifying experience of her life, to the most exhilarating. She is moving in with man she loves, the father of her child, the one man who can make her truly laugh, the only man she can imagine spending her life with. As he hangs up she takes a deep breath and tells him that their time had run out, they could avoid telling the team no longer.  
  
tbc....Heeeeeere Joey, Joey, Joey.heeeeeere boy.. 


	7. Chatper 7

Title: When it All Comes Crashing Down  
  
Author: Stepf/CSIphile  
  
Random Musings: So the team finds out. But will they all be happy about it? Find out this week on..oh wait. Heh. I know, I know, no Joey yet. But come on, after Fear, don't they deserve some happy? Trust me, there is more fic with Joey than without, cause I know how y'all love him so. If all goes well you will get another chapter tonight.  
  
Thanks: A fabulous beta, Din, who suffers through this pre clean up, the woman is a saint.  
  
  
  
  
  
"Gris?"  
  
"Hey, what's up?" He turns and looks at her, his brow creasing in confusion; she didn't have that shirt on earlier.  
  
"We have to tell them now. Catherine already knows." She frowns slightly and places one hand on her belly. They had both been hoping to keep this to themselves a bit longer.  
  
"Ok, is everyone here?" At her nod he thinks for a moment. "All right, stay here, I'll page them. You ready? And you weren't wearing that earlier."  
  
"Ready as I can be. No, I wasn't. That's very observant, and don't ask. Are we telling them everything?" she asks as she moves to his side and leans on the desk watching him punches numbers into the phone.  
  
"Might as well."  
  
Again she nods and smiles at him. While their relationship is not much of a secret on the night shift, she doubts any of them expect this. Reaching down, she lightly touches his shoulder, he looks up and smiles. He is more excited than he anticipated being. Something about telling his friends about the baby really makes it real. He watches as slowly Catherine, then Greg, and finally Warrick and Nick enter the room. Everyone except Catherine is wearing expressions of confusion, which only grow upon seeing Sara already in his office, leaning on the desk. Grissom waits until everyone is seated before squeezing Sara's hand and starting.  
  
"Nicky, please close the door...thanks. Ok guys, I am sure you want to know why I paged you in here. First I need to impress upon you that what is said in this room is kept IN this room, between us. Understood?  
  
Receiving nods and a few looks of fear he continues.  
  
"Two things...First, Sara and I have moved in together."  
  
Sara watches as Catherine looks surprised, she hadn't known this. "Secondly." he pauses and looks at Sara again. ".we are going to have a baby. Sara is pregnant."  
  
Grissom and Sara watch as surprise hits each of the men's faces, followed by smiles, by all except one. Nick watches her, she looks happy, but is that just a front? Sara had mentioned to him once she didn't see herself as a mother. His concern initially dampens whatever joy he should have for them. Sara picks up on Nicks hesitation and finally speaks.  
  
"I know this is a shock, it was to us too, but it's fine. Really, it's a good thing, we are very excited. Its something neither of us wanted, but now that in May we'll be parents, its something we are looking forward to." She smiles at Nick, allaying some of his fears.  
  
Warrick is the first to speak. "Well, congratulations are in order then." He gets up and hugs Sara carefully. "I'm happy for you both." He whispers and pulls away, allowing Catherine access to the younger woman.  
  
Catherine hugs her tightly and gives her a smile. "I didn't say it before but, congrats. You will make fabulous parents. And is anyone else scared about how smart this kid will be? It'll probably come out better at our jobs than us." The last few sentences are directed to the group and is met with a few chuckles.  
  
After quickly hugging Greg and laughing when he comments about her being off the market, she looks at Nick. He has said nothing yet, and Sara assumed that he would be the happiest of them all for her. They lock eyes momentarily and she is about to say something when Grissom's voice breaks her concentration.  
  
"Remember, you guys are the only ones that know, and we want it to stay that way for a while."  
  
Warrick frowns at him before speaking. "Grissom, you aren't going to be able to hide for long if she's due in May. What then?"  
  
Catherine quickly speaks up. "Legally they can't ask you who the father is. So as long as you don't offer the information up nothing will happen; it's not their business. They can suspect all they want, but suspecting won't get either of you fired."  
  
Grissom smiles at her. "Thanks Cath. The housing situation will be handled carefully as well; Mobley already knows about us. Hopefully, this won't change things as long as we don't alter our workplace behavior."  
  
They all nod and Nick speaks. "We won't say anything, you can count on us."  
  
"I know we can. Thank you. All right, let's get back to work, okay?"  
  
They nod and slowly leave the room, Sara watches Nick go, and frowns. He means as much to her as Grissom, she had expected him to be happy for her, not barely speak. She turns to Grissom with a sad look and he just nods, indicating that he had also noticed Nicks silence. Sara quickly leaves the room and walks quickly down the hall, catching up with Nick halfway to his destination of the break room.  
  
"Nick." she calls out and he turns slowly, knowing this was coming, but oddly unwilling to face her.  
  
"Yeah?" he asks, keeping his expression and tone neutral.  
  
"What's wrong?"  
  
"What do you mean?" He tries to act innocent, hoping she will buy the act. The look on her face though is enough for him to know she didn't.  
  
"What do I.? Are you kidding me? You barely spoke in there, I was hoping you would be a little more excited for us." She gives him a big grin, trying to pull him out of whatever his problem is.  
  
"I don't think this is the best place to discuss this," he responds grimly.  
  
Looking around Sara notices an empty layout room. She grabs his arm and forcibly yanks him in, shutting the door behind her. "Talk, now." She commands.  
  
"Sara, I want to be happy for you; after everything that's happened, you deserve some joy in your life I'm just concerned for you. Joey has only been gone for 3 months, have you had enough time to recover? Not just physically, but emotionally?"  
  
"I've already been to the doctors Nick. Every thing is fine, they don't think my injuries will be a problem. And the meds I was on they don't think did any damage, but they can't be 100% sure. Emotionally is a little different, I've gotten better Nick, so much better since then, you know that. I only get nightmares once in a while instead of everyday and talking to Elizabeth on occasion helps. It's fine, really." She smiles again at him.  
  
"But Sara, you have said to me on more than one occasion that children held no interest for you, that you didn't want them. I want to make sure that you really are happy and not just convincing yourself of that."  
  
"Nicky, you're going to have to trust me here. I know what I said, but Nick, its Grissom. Don't you see? I need you to see Nick." Her tone is imploring, she wants nothing more than for her best friend to understand, to see why this is something great, not something to be feared.  
  
He looks in her eyes and sees no sign of deception and allows a small smile to form on his lips. "Yeah, I see. You'll be good parents Sara and I'm happy for you, really."  
  
"Good. Thank you."  
  
Suddenly something occurs to him. "Wait.the meds?" Nick quickly does the math based on her due date. "Oh my.Sara. You were pregnant when we.we, had the accident." His voice is somber and he leans against the table behind him. The weight of what she said coming down on him. If he had tried harder, if he had done something different, would she even have to wonder if her baby is ok?  
  
"Yeah, that night actually." Approaching him, she stands in front of his still form, Nick's head is tilted down, looking at the floor, she can see the guilt radiating off him.  
  
"You couldn't have done anything Nick, no one could. Don't beat yourself up about it. Everything's fine, I know it is. This is a tough kid Nick, and one that was simply meant to be." She touches his arm and he finally looks at her; satisfied with her answer.  
  
Acting impulsively, Nick reaches out and pulls her into a tight hug, wrapping his long arms around her and holding her close. Pulling away after a few minutes he gives her a genuine smile and kisses her cheek.  
  
"Cath is right, that kid is going to be smart at birth, it's a little scary."  
  
Stepping back from Nick, Sara smiles at him. "God I hope not, one Grissom is enough for me."  
  
"Yeah, I can see that. Well you're not showing yet, that's good. Hopefully you guys can keep it quiet from Mobley and Eck a bit longer."  
  
"I don't think we have much time, I do have a small bump and my jeans were a struggle this morning. I think Gris wants to talk to Brian today, too. Ecklie can find out when he does, he's neither of our boss."  
  
Nick laughs lightly. "This will be amusing, if nothing else. You know we won't tell Eck who the father is; and it will drive the day shift supervisor crazy." Nick wraps an arm around her shoulder and leads them out of the room.  
  
tbc....... 


	8. Chapter 8

Title: When It All Comes Crashing Down  
  
Author: Stepf/CSIphile  
  
Notes: None, more downfall of people finding out, but its all good. Sara puts the smackdown on Ecklie, that cant be a bad thing. You are probably bored stupid waiting for Joey, but give me some credit for writing 8 chapters of Grissom and Sara without angst, I'm pretty sure that's a personal record.  
  
Thanks: You know who you are. Of course you readers, without you, I'd be nothing.  
  
  
  
  
  
At the same time, Grissom is sitting in Mobley's office, waiting for the explosion from the sheriff.  
  
"Well, Gil. This isn't what I meant by keeping your relationship to yourselves." The younger man sighs loudly and rubs his forehead. "Do you purposely do this stuff to make my life more difficult? Or is it just some knack you have?"  
  
"Yeah Brian, we didn't have anything better to do, so we figured why not make **your** life harder." Grissom stares down the man with a hard glare; Mobley can be a prick sometimes. "Besides, its nobody's business who the father is, and legally you can't ask."  
  
"Very true. Are you planning on getting married?" he asks. "I could care less if you have a child out of wedlock, I just wants to be prepared to explain it to my superiors."  
  
Grissom is surprised by the question, since no one has asked him that yet, and honestly he hasn't considered the option. Not that he is opposed to marrying Sara; he can't picture spending life without her. They hadn't discussed it and he isn't even sure she would want to. It would seem too much like they were getting married because of the baby, and if they did that wouldn't be the reason. Grissom is so lost in thought he forgets that Mobley even posed a question.  
  
"Gil?"  
  
"I.don't know right now Brian. But if that changes I will let you know. I'll be sure to wait until right before the next election though."  
  
Brian gives Grissom an exasperated look. "That's not funny Gil."  
  
"I know," he states simply, his expression never changing.  
  
"We will deal with it as best we can, don't have a choice. But I advise you not to broadcast you're the father to anyone besides your shift; that will cause more headaches than it's worth."  
  
Grissom easily reads between the lines: Ecklie doesn't need to know. "No problem. Thanks, Brian. You've been.helpful." Grissom actually is surprised by Mobely's open attitude on the matter; this could be a lot worse without his support.  
  
Two weeks after telling the team, Sara is yet again trying to zip up her pants, this time; however, the zipper refuses to make its way to the top. Sighing loudly and throwing her hands up, she turns back to the closet in search of something she can wear to work. While rifling through the clothes, Grissom walks into the room and watches her. She is standing with only her jeans and bra on, the former not zipped and he suspects why: just the night before he commented how quickly her belly seemed to grow lately. She had retorted the kid was making up for lost time. He chuckles lightly at the memory and almost laughs out loud at her when she lets out a loud groan.  
  
Slowly he approaches her and wraps his arms around her waist, moderately surprised when she stiffens at first before relaxing. Every once in a while she still starts at the phone, or tenses if he approaches her from behind.  
  
"I cannot find a pair of pants to wear! These fit two days ago," she gripes and pulls away from him.  
  
"Well I think its time you went shopping, I think you've gotten off easy, being 17 weeks and not having gone already," he says with a smirk, knowing that he is goading her.  
  
"You know I hate shopping, and besides, everything for maternity is.not me."  
  
She shrugs and pulls out an old pair of jeans, they had been pretty loose on her at one time, hopefully enough to wear them now. Quickly taking off the offending jeans and putting on the new pair, Sara is pleased when she can button and zip them, if only barely. Finishing dressing with a boat- neck black shirt, she appraises the look in the full length mirror. For the first time, it's obvious that she is pregnant; on her thin body the bulge at her belly button is noticeable.  
  
While she makes a big show of her annoyance with maternity clothes, Grissom knows that Sara can't wait until she can feel the baby moving around. The doctor said anytime now it should happen.  
  
"I know, Sara. But you have to at some point," he hollers from the bathroom.  
  
"Yeah, yeah. I know."  
  
Walking out he smiles at her appreciably; Sara is a beautiful woman, he has told her that, but something about her pregnancy makes her breathtaking. Pregnancy seems to agree with her; she has color in her face, and has gained back all the weight she lost in the past few months. She looks back at him with her eyebrows raised, confused by his expression.  
  
"Gris? You ready?"  
  
"I love you," he says suddenly. "More than you know." Approaching her, he kisses her deeply, a surge of electricity running through both of them. He never fails to surprise her.  
  
"I Love you, too. Everything okay?" She cocks her head to one side and looks at him concerned.  
  
"Everything's great. Perfect actually." He smiles and lets her go.  
  
  
  
Walking through the halls that evening, Sara gets a few stares, but chooses to ignore them; her personal life is not anyone's business. Looking down at a file folder, Sara is surprised when a solid object stops her forward movement. Scrunching her nose in confusion she looks up and is disturbed to see Ecklie staring intently at her. She steps back and moves to walk around when Ecklies annoying voice calls her back.  
  
"Well, I guess what I heard is true."  
  
Sara watches as his gaze drifts down. She just raises one eyebrow at him and doesn't respond.  
  
"I wasn't aware you were seeing anyone, and the last time I checked it's never a good idea to sleep with colleagues."  
  
He is baiting her, she can tell. "Well Conrad, you aren't aware of a lot of things. If you will excuse me, I have work to do."  
  
"Looks like you already did some, well at least enough." He pauses, she guesses to gauge her reaction, and when she refuses to give him one, continues. "I'm guessing you'll be taken off field work soon, given your condition. And I'm sure Grissom wont mind having you around the lab more."  
  
The expression on his face says way more than words could and Sara easily reads it. Despite he is implying the truth, its none of his damn business. This gets her blood boiling and she takes a calm step toward the supervisor, her eyes narrowing.  
  
"You keep that up and I'll have your job by weeks end. The department doesn't look favorably upon harassment, and I'm sure even less when you are harassing a pregnant woman. It's a slippery slope you're on Conrad, so I'd watch it." Sara manages to keep her voice even and non-threatening, calm even, finally taking a step back and walking away, leaving the dayshift supervisor to simply watch her go.  
  
Walking into the break room, Sara is greeted by the rest of the team, who are seated waiting for Grissom to bring the assignments. Grabbing a cup of coffee, she gets a funny look from Nick as she sits.  
  
"One cup a day Nick, and after my run in with Ecklie, I need it." She takes a small sip and almost moans at the delicious taste.  
  
"Ecklie? What about him?" Grissom asks as he walks in.  
  
"Nothing, we had a little discussion and I set him straight." At his unconvinced expression she continues. "Seriously, its fine."  
  
He raises one eyebrow at her but quickly hands off the assignments. Catherine and Warrick work one murder while Grissom, Sara and Nick work another. Splitting off, Sara and Nick go to get the kits while Grissom talks to Cath about their case. Entering the locker room, Sara quickly snatches hers and Grissom's cases and is walking out when Nick takes one from her. She scowls slightly and looks at him.  
  
"I can carry two cases, Nick. Really, I'm not that fragile."  
  
"Sara, just shut up and let me do it. I know you're not, but why make it more difficult."  
  
"Cause I can do it, I don't want people treating me differently."  
  
"Sara, just accept that at some point you wont be able to do everything. And for now make me happy, ok? It's that proper southern boy in me coming out."  
  
She sighs and holds the door open for him. Sara's not happy about it, but he's right, eventually she will be stuck in the lab and for now should appreciate the fact she can go to scenes.  
  
Later while photographing the body, Sara is humming lightly when a strange feeling in the pit of her stomach stops her. Pausing, she waits and when nothing happens continues with the job, bending down to get a better shot of the victims face. Taking two pictures in quick succession, she stands up only to be rewarded with a stabbing feeling, not painful, just weird, in her side.  
  
"Ouch.damn it. What the." she says aloud, and puts a hand where the feeling was quickly realizing what it is.  
  
'I'll be damned,' she thinks, and calls out to Grissom.  
  
"Gris.come here," she yells, he is down the hall and it takes him a minute to reach her.  
  
"You find something?" he asks and looks around.  
  
"Nope.ouch." She quickly grabs his hand and places it on the side of her belly, watching his face as the baby does another somersault.  
  
His eyes get huge, and he presses a little harder into her skin, hoping for another chance to feel the movement. After a few minutes, nothing happens and Sara shrugs her shoulders.  
  
"I guess that was enough. You did feel him right?" She had started referring to the baby as him shortly after visiting the doctor the first time.  
  
"Yeah, that was.wow Sara." He truly is in awe; every new thing that happens reminds him how lucky he is. "Is that the first time you felt it?"  
  
"Yes, you would have known if I felt it before." Her tone is light; knowing he only asked the question out of excitement.  
  
At that moment Nick chooses to enter the room and sees them standing there, Grissom's hand still pressing into her.  
  
"What's going on guys?"  
  
"I felt the baby move." She is beaming at him.  
  
"Seriously? Cool. Is it still moving?"  
  
"Nope, seems to have stopped."  
  
"Bummer."  
  
She smiles at the younger man. "I'll let you know when he starts up again."  
  
"Cool. Hey Gris? I found something you might want to look at." He cocks one thumb behind him, indicating the living room where he was working.  
  
"Ok, let's go." He follows Nick out, giving Sara a smile as he passes the threshold.  
  
Standing in the break room several hours later, Sara is still grinning from ear to ear, she has been waiting for what seems like weeks to feel it. Grabbing a water, she drinks half the bottle before again she feels movement. Looking up, Sara sees Nick walking by; she quickly calls out to him.  
  
"Nicky!"  
  
He pauses and takes a step back to look through the door. "Yeah?"  
  
She grins mischievously at him. "Still want to feel it?"  
  
"Oh yeah," he says and swiftly approaches her. She reaches out and grabs his one hand, applying it to just under her belly button. After waiting several minutes Nick is about to pull his hand away when the smallest flutter of movement reaches his hand. Nick smiles at her when another flutter gets his attention and then stops. "That's too cool Sara, it's like a little alien in there."  
  
She laughs before responding. "Yeah Nick, like an alien, thanks."  
  
tbc... I know I put that Joey around here somewhere.. 


	9. Chapter 9

Title: When it All Comes Crashing Down  
  
Author: Stepf/CSIphile  
  
Notes: He's baaaaaaaaaaack. Don't say I didn't warn you.  
  
Thanks: To Miss Din, who bravely goes where no man should ever, my bad grammar. She also makes some fabulous suggestions, only improving this fic of mine. Thank you readers, your long wait for everyone's favorite stalker is over. I appreciate the reviews, y'all rock.  
Shifting in her sleep, Sara wakens the man next to her. Grissom slowly opens his eyes to Sara moving for the umpteenth time that hour.  
  
'She must be having some kind of dream,' he thinks and rolls on his side to face her.  
  
A piece of information he read, or had Catherine told him, comes to mind; it is normal for pregnant women to have odd dreams. Again, Sara moves, this time a strangled cry reaches his ears. Finally he decides to wake her; he can't stand to see her like this.  
  
"Sara.." he whispers. No response from the sleeping woman.  
  
"Sara." This time louder and he touches her arm. This time her eyes snap open to Grissom's eyes looking at her, her face covered in alarm. "Hey babe, you ok? Sara?"  
  
"Fine, weird dreams." She shrugs him off and gets out of bed to use the bathroom.  
  
"Sara." His tone indicates he can tell she isn't being entirely truthful.  
  
"Really Gris.weird dream, that's all." She flashes him a smile and closes the bathroom door, she hadn't been lying exactly, it was a weird dream, what she failed to tell him is that Joey Harrington was in it.  
He isn't sure what happening. One minute he is sitting in his room, reading quietly, the next they call his name and he is brought before a panel of doctors. The doctors talk quietly amongst themselves; he can't hear them. There is much flipping of papers and more talking. Finally one of the group, the one in the middle speaks to him. He can't understand what they are saying, the technical terms confuse him, but he hears one word only. "Released."  
"Gil, are you sure this is a good idea?" she asks as she moves through the living room into the kitchen, admiring again the wood cabinets.  
  
"Yes, Catherine, I do."  
  
"But Sara."  
  
"Sara is at work; if she knows it will ruin the surprise, Cath."  
  
"I know that, Grissom." She turns to face the older man and sighs, "I just, I feel guilty."  
  
"Why? We aren't doing anything wrong."  
  
She shakes her head and walks to the window, admiring the view; it is beautiful here.  
  
"You're house hunting with me instead of your.Sara. Who is carrying your child might I add." She pauses for a moment. "Never thought I would string those words together."  
  
"Well, its really not much of a gift if she knows Catherine, and I just need your opinion on these last couple. I've seen many more than you have." He stands next to her at the window and also appreciates the view.  
  
"I know, I know. It's a beautiful gift, Gris, I'm sure she will love it. But you really don't want her thoughts on this?"  
  
"Cath, I know her better than I know myself, I have for a long time. We need a fresh start, you know?"  
  
She lightly touches his arm. "Yeah, I know. I know."  
  
Turning, she appraises the house once more; its beautiful. A rounded archway from the door leads into a large living room with a country style kitchen and formal dining room. At the back of the house are 3 spacious bedrooms and two baths. But the view is really what sells Catherine, there is an unobstructed view of the mountains and the sunset is gorgeous; plus it sits on nearly half an acre, huge by Vegas standards.  
  
"This is it," she finally states.  
  
"Yeah, I was hoping you would say that." He smiles at her. "Just in time, too. I've got two weeks until Christmas and that should give me enough time to close. Thank you Catherine."  
  
"You're welcome." Catherine hugs her old friend and smiles, she couldn't be happier for him. "She'll love it."  
  
The comfortable silence that permeates the car on the way to Catherine's house is shattered when she asks the question that has been on her mind for weeks.  
  
"Are you planning on marrying her?" she asks suddenly.  
  
"WHAT?" He looks at her briefly before turning back to the road.  
  
"I asked if you're going to marry her, Gil. You're buying a house for her, you're having a baby, your whole world is changing. It seems like the next thing to do."  
  
"Catherine, I really don't think this is your business."  
  
"Gil, I don't care either way, it's your life. Nor do I think you should get married because of the baby. I was married first, then had the kid and it didn't last, whatever makes you two happy. I was just curious."  
  
"We haven't discussed it," is all he says, lost in thought.  
Drumming his fingers on the counter, he waits patiently for Sara to return home from the lab. He had dropped off Catherine and come right home; he knew she would be working some overtime this morning, since the dayshift needed her physics knowledge for something. It had given him the perfect opportunity to take Catherine with him to look at the houses to which he had narrowed down his search.  
  
Grissom had been fortunate enough to find a real estate agent capable of putting together a variety of houses in a short span of time. It had been under two weeks from when he thought of buying a house, to finally picking the house that morning. It had been hard to keep from her, very hard. He kept most of the information in his briefcase, or his desk, two places she never went. He is debating what Catherine asked in the car, when the door opening shakes him from thought.  
  
"Hey Gris," she calls brightly. After dropping her coat and keys at the door, she kisses him.  
  
"Hey, how was the OT?" He watches as she grabs fruit out of the refrigerator.  
  
"Easy, mostly involved sitting and figuring out angles for them. Multiple homicide and they couldn't figure it out." She pops a grape in her mouth and chews quickly. "I don't know how they solve anything with Ecklie in charge, that guy is a moron."  
  
She finally looks at him, and the odd expression on his face. "Gris? You ok?"  
  
"Yeah, fine. Sara..I know we haven't discussed this, but I think we should."  
  
"What?" She puts the snack back and leans against the counter, giving him her full attention.  
  
"I'm not saying I want to...or I don't, I want to know what your thoughts are."  
  
She raises an eyebrow and he continues. "Marriage," he finally spits out.  
  
"Oh, I see, marriage. Do you want to?"  
  
"I.I want to make you happy, Sara. If that will, then I would. But I don't see how it will make a difference in the way we live our lives."  
  
Smiling, she touches his cheek. "I don't need a piece of paper from the State of Nevada telling me what I already know; that I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I don't need it, and I don't think we need it because of the baby; he will have your name anyway. I know we are in this together; I like our life."  
  
"I like our life too." He smiles at her and pulls her in for a fierce kiss. She responds in kind and starts to giggle as he walks her backward into the bedroom, raining light kisses on her neck as they go.  
  
As they cross the threshold she laughs lightly and whispers in his ear. "Besides.Sara Grissom? That's an awful sounding name."  
  
He smirks at her and shakes his head, but he as to admit, it does sound weird. "Stop talking," he whispers back and gets a nod in response.  
The hospital gave him a few hundred dollars, the name of a psychiatrist he is to contact, and the address of a local boarding house he could stay at until he was up on his feet. Joey isn't sure how such good fortune came upon him; he should have been locked in that dreary place for another 3 years at least. Not dwelling on it, he approaches the door of the halfway house and knocks, the beginning of his new adventure. After he settles in here, he knows what is next and the thought brings him more joy than he thought possible; Sara. She has been in his thoughts and dreams since being locked up He holds no grudge against her; it was everyone else who made her do it, who made her turn against him, to hide her love for him. But now they can be together; nothing is stopping them.  
He presses his hand against her naked belly, hoping for some movement. Sara smiles at the top of his head which is resting on her shoulder. At some point he had gotten up and turned on Mozart, mumbling something about increasing intelligence before returning to bed and placing himself in the position he is in now.  
  
"Grissom.I think he's sleeping."  
  
"Sara.shhhh. I'm trying to talk to him." True to his word, Grissom starts talking to the baby, in low tones so Sara can't hear. She watches amused as he lightly rubs circles in her skin, and talks. Just as she is about to tell him the baby can't hear him, a hard kick is directed at Grissom's hand. Grissom looks up at her surprised and she just shrugs, surprised herself. He resumes making figures on her skin, a feeling she is enjoying immensely, and talking.  
  
"He likes your voice," she says quietly. Since the kick, the baby has been moving quite a bit, slowing when Grissom pauses or slows. "What are you boys discussing?"  
  
"His beautiful mother."  
  
She smirks at him before a wide smile takes over her face. "Uh huh. I think you are planning some kind of coup now, since I'm the only female here."  
  
"You know I could be wrong; it could be a girl."  
  
"You're not wrong. I'm sure of it."  
  
He brings his head up to hers and lays it on the pillow facing her. "When do we find out?"  
  
"My appointment is on the 3rd after New Years. You sure you want to know?"  
  
"Positive. Catherine invited us for Christmas dinner, do you want to go?"  
  
Sara considers it before answering. "No, I'd rather spend it alone with you."  
  
"Okay, whatever you want."  
  
"Ohhhh, whatever I want huh? In that case I want a home in the country with a four by four and the white picket fence. And maybe a big dog."  
  
"White picket fence?"  
  
"Yeah, you got a problem with that?"  
  
"Not at all." He leans in and kisses her lightly as she runs her long fingers across his back and winks at him.  
  
tbc...... with more Joey of course. 


	10. Chapter 10

Title: When it all Comes Crashing Down  
  
Author: Stepf/CSIphile  
  
Notes: You asked for him, you got him last chapter. This time he makes a repeat performance as.. Heh. Anyway, more Joey, though no contact yet, what fun would that be??  
  
Thanks: Everyone. Din, Meggie, Dev, the CSI world as I know it. Y'all inspire me. And the readers, thank you for the reviews, please, keep it up! Does a writers heart good!  
He waits on the other side of the road, watching the entrance to the Las Vegas Crime Lab like a hawk. He had been there the night before, but he didn't see her and assumed she hadn't worked that night. It is three days before Christmas, and he is anxious to talk to her again, but not yet; he needs to approach slowly when others aren't around. He needs to be cautious, Joey knows he is only out because what he thinks was an error somewhere, and at some point they will figure out he is missing. Everyday that passes gives him more confidence, it has already been three weeks. Until they come looking he works extra shifts at the construction company that the half-way house placed him with, saving money for when he and Sara need to run.  
  
Finally he sees a blue Tahoe pull into the lot and park under a broken light; he can see her profile in the window of the truck. Licking his lips, Joey watches her get out but has to squint to see her, with the light out and no moon, the area around her in covered in darkness. Add to that she is wearing all black, and Joey can only make out her face; regardless, he watches her walk around the truck and, meeting Grissom on the other side, walk away from Joey into the lab. He smiles slightly; this is a start. She still works at the same place, but his Sara is still seeing that man, the one that seems to think she loves him.  
  
'She can't love him, she only loves me,' he thinks and pulls away, planning how to make his presence known.  
  
"This is the first Christmas tree I have had in years, he says, and watches the lights flicker in the darkness of the room.  
  
"Well, since next year there will be a kid, I think its about time that we did the things that normal people do around the holidays."  
  
She moves closer to him on the couch, settling her head in the crook of his shoulder. There is something about the tree and the smell of pine cones and presents under the tree that brings back happier memories for Sara of her childhood. Christmas was one of the rare holidays that her family chose to celebrate, her parents had said something about the holiday symbolizing peace and prosperity for humanity.  
  
"Since when do we do things normally?"  
  
"Since now. I don't want this kid growing up a hermit, socially clueless like us. It's not fair."  
  
"I'm not clueless, I just prefer science to people."  
  
Raising her head she lifts an eyebrow. "Yeah, that's a great example for a toddler. I want him to like science and not be afraid of what we do, but at the same time be what I wasn't: friendly, outgoing, graceful, and capable of conversing with LIVE people without scaring them off or thinking he's crazy."  
  
"He'll be fine, that's what we have Warrick, Nick and Cath for." He smiles at her and wraps one arm around her shoulders.  
  
Biting her lower lip Sara stares at the neatly wrapped packages, she has been patient up to this point, but her ability to hide her excitement is quickly waning. She has never been this excited for Christmas before, Grissom makes her that way.  
  
"You want your gift?" he asks after noticing her look.  
  
"Am I that obvious?" She sits up and looks at him.  
  
"Only to me.All right, but let's go for a ride first." At her confused look he gets up and holds out a hand to her. As she takes it, and pulls herself up he continues, "Just humor me, Sara. Go to the bathroom now and grab a coat."  
  
"Ohhhkay." She draws out and heads to the bathroom, stopping once to look over her shoulder. Grissom takes the opportunity to decide that pregnancy agrees with her, something Grissom never though he would bear witness to. Watching her from behind, you can't even tell she is pregnant, Sara has gained twenty-five pounds already, but it's not noticeable, some is replacing what she lost, the rest is all baby weight. But if she wasn't showing, you would never know. When she emerges from the bathroom Grissom realizes it not just the weight she gained, her features have softened some, giving her tall thin body more curves than usual. He knows it's trite and overused, but she really does have a glow about her. Grissom has always been attracted to Sara on more than just the physical level, but something about her carrying his baby is irresistible to him.  
  
Smiling as she approaches him, he places a hand on her back and guides her to the truck, trying not to let his excitement show.  
  
Twenty minutes from his townhouse Grissom turns into a neighborhood. Sara makes note of the name carved on a plaque at the entrance, Cranbrook.  
  
"Gris, why are we here?" Sara looks around confused as he purposefully navigates the streets of the neighborhood, obviously familiar with them. She didn't think anyone from the team lived out this way.  
  
"Nick told me about some lights at this house we should see."  
  
Sara looks at him dubiously but nods in agreement; something else is going on, she can tell, but she isn't sure what. Two left turns later, Grissom pulls into the driveway of a house that appears is empty, but there are indeed Christmas lights surrounding the outside windows, doorways and frame the two car garage. Grissom gets out of the car and indicates for her to follow. Hesitantly she gets out of the car and walks up the driveway, pulling her coat tightly around her; even in Vegas, December at night is cold.  
  
Following him up to the covered porch she stops next to him and looks around.  
  
"Grissom, is this a good idea? Someone could see us and this isn't our house."  
  
Unexpectedly, Grissom unlocks the front door and ushers her in; he can see she is shivering.  
  
"Grissom! What.."  
  
"I love you Sara, and I hope you don't mind, but I took the liberty." Pausing for effect he quickly continues when she opens her mouth. "This IS our house."  
  
"Excuse me?" She looks at him with disbelief.  
  
"Merry Christmas." He indicates house with one arm, the other still on her arm.  
  
"You bought. a house.for Christmas? You're kidding." Looking around she finally realizes he is serious. "Oh God, your not kidding." She stands stunned for a moment, looking around. Slowly she starts moving, making a large circle in the living room.  
  
"You.wow. I don't know what to say."  
  
"Are you ok with this? I mean, you weren't involved in the process."  
  
"Oh, yes. This is the best gift ever. You are an amazing man." Walking back to him she flings her arms around his neck. "I love you so much. You can still surprise me Gil Grissom."  
  
"I try, Sara." He smiles back as she lets out a small squeal and begins searching the house; the look on her face was worth it all. 


	11. Chapter 11

Title: When it All Comes Crashing Down  
  
Author: Stepf/CSIphile  
  
Notes: He's back, but not quite creating havoc yet. That's the next chapter.bwhahahahahahaha. Anyway...Sorry this took sooooo long to update. RL has been intrusive.  
  
Thanks: Everyone who has reviewed, it really is inspirational to know you are enjoying this ficcrap of mine! Keep it up.  
She places the last of the books in a small box and blows hair from her face. Sitting up from her hunched position, Sara pulls the rubber band out of her hair only to quickly pull her hair back and secure the errant hairs. Looking around, she takes in Grissom's townhouse, brown boxes line one wall, all carefully marked in her precise handwriting. The guys were coming over that weekend to move them to the new house.  
  
'New house' she thinks.  
  
Grissom had certainly surprised her with it, never in a million years had she expected him to buy them a house for Christmas, and now, for the second time in five weeks she is moving. Clapping her hands together she look at the job just accomplished and the one that needs to be. Sighing, she gets up and is on her way to grab a bottle of water when her cell phone rings. Quickly grabbing it off the island, she smiles at the display.  
  
"Hey," she answers.  
  
"Hey, how's it going?"  
  
"Good God, man. You have a lot of books, more than me; ten boxes and almost two hours later I am finally done. The butterflies are next." Her tone is light and she leans against the counter.  
  
"Just don't strain yourself and no picking up the boxes, okay?"  
  
"I know, I know, that's why I am packing, remember? Because I can't help move. If you guys need me at the lab, I can come in."  
  
"Don't worry about us Sara, we're fine. Enjoy some of your time off; don't just work the whole time."  
  
"I won't, you know me."  
  
"Yes, I do, and that's why I'm saying it."  
  
"Yeah, yeah, ok. I'm going to pack the butterflies and then call it a day. Maybe get out for a while."  
  
"Ok, see you after shift."  
  
"Ok, tell everyone I said hi."  
  
"Will do."  
  
Grissom looks up as he hangs up the phone and waves in Catherine who had been standing in the doorway, watching. He has undergone a transformation since Sara got pregnant, one she never thought she would see. Gil Grissom was coming out of his shell, interacting with people more and seemingly enjoying it. When he is on a case, he is the same man as before, doggedly determined to catch the bad guy, but he seems to empathize with the victim more.  
  
Turing his attention to Catherine, Grissom sees the smile plastered on her face. "What?" he asks.  
  
"When did you get so domestic, Gil? It becomes you."  
  
He raises an eyebrow at her and hands over the call that just came in. "Take Nicky."  
  
"Uh huh. Just admit it, you're enjoying all this." At his stone face she smirks and leaves.  
  
Grissom watches her go and shakes his head. He is enjoying this, more than he anticipated. It is like a whole new world has been opened for him, and he found out what he had been missing in the old one.  
Scrunching her nose, Sara debates the best way to get these things into boxes without any of them breaking. While working the problem, the house phone rings and she turns to look at it dubiously. His house phone rarely rings for either of them, everyone they know calls on their cells. When it doesn't stop ringing, she finally walks over to it, lifts the cradle off the receiver and says hello. She is greeted by silence, but not the silence of someone who hung up, the silence of an open line. Shivers go down her back, but she quickly dismisses them.  
  
"Hello." She repeats and finally hangs up the phone, not thinking twice about it.  
  
He finally gets to hear her voice, for the first time in months. Hanging up the phone, he sighs and looks at the receptionist for the construction company.  
  
"Your sister not there?" she asks politely.  
  
"No, must be out. Thanks for finding me that number though, I can't believe I lost it." He gives her a genuine smile.  
  
"No problem, amazing what you can find on the internet."  
  
He nods at her and walks out the trailer door heading for the job site. She can't know yet that he is out, that would ruin the whole surprise.  
She stands in the foyer and watches as Nicky, Warrick and Grissom bring box after box through the doorway. She fidgets from foot to foot, annoyed that she can't do anything productive except watch. Earlier she had attempted to pick up a small box and had promptly been chastened by Nick. When the last of the kitchen boxes are placed on the island, she starts unpacking everything she had just packed only 3 days before. This part doesn't bother Sara so much, she likes organizing and finding a place for everything, it soothes her mind. Making quick work of the kitchen, Sara sits in one of the dining room table chairs, even though these are supposed to be the easiest months of pregnancy, she still gets tired quickly. Looking at her ever increasing belly and running a hand over the red sweater covering it, Sara smiles. It is amazing to her how much her life has changed in such a short time frame, but it's not a bad change.  
  
Leaving her hand on the side of her stomach, Sara is rewarded with a small movement, nothing like what she has been feeling as of late, she swears the kid is bruising her insides. She grimaces when he moves quickly and then wrinkles her nose when it stops; the baby is currently residing on her bladder. Sighing loudly, she gets up and heads to the bathroom, passing Grissom on the way.  
  
"How're you doing?" At her mock annoyed expression, he continues, "Sorry, sorry. You're not made of glass, I know."  
  
She smiles before answering. "I'm fine, but the kid is in a mood, he is kicking my insides to death all of a sudden, and planting himself on my bladder."  
  
"You know, we're in big trouble if that's a girl. She's going to have a complex before birth."  
  
Sara shrugs before sidestepping him. "Excuse me, HE'S pressing harder."  
  
Watching her move effortlessly around him Grissom grins.  
  
He had showed up at Grissom's townhouse fifteen minutes too late, she was already gone. There are no vehicles in the driveway and the house is empty of furnishings. Joey looks around the porch area and narrows his eyes, he can't believe she would betray him like that. Pacing back and forth, he catches the eye of a neighbor who comes outside.  
  
"Excuse me. Can I help you?"  
  
Turing to the older woman, Joey pastes on a fake smile. "Why, yes. I must have missed my sister and her boyfriend. Do you know where they moved to?"  
  
"No, I sure don't. Lovely couple though. She's.."  
  
"Thank you." Joey quickly says and angrily takes off. He has to find her.  
  
tbc........... 


	12. Chapter 12

Y'all know the title and who I am by now; lets skip that part, shall we?  
  
Notes: Here is a nice long section for you guys. Enjoy, it's the beginning of the madness...bwhahahahahaha!  
Curled on the couch with her head in Grissom's lap, Sara's eyes begin to close of their own accord. He isn't helping matters though; one hand is placed firmly on the baby the other running through her hair.  
  
"Sara?" he asks quietly, not sure if she is asleep yet.  
  
"Mmmm," is her mumbled response.  
  
"Come on, you need to go to bed."  
  
"Not yet." She rolls over onto her back and looks at him with sleep coated eyes. "Have I mentioned how much I love you?"  
  
"I know."  
  
"This is the most incredible thing anyone has ever done for me. I love this house Grissom, it's perfect, and the view is incredible."  
  
"You're welcome, Sara. I just thought with the baby we needed a fresh start, someplace with no bad memories, someplace that isn't mine or yours, but ours."  
  
"Well you did good." She stretches briefly before waking more fully and giving him a mischievous grin. Running her hand up his chest and coming to a stop on the back of his neck she pulls him down into her, kissing him deeply. He responds in kind, pulling her up slightly. Finally breaking for air, Sara bites her lower lip and stares at him with desire in her eyes. Getting up, she silently grabs his hands and pulls him into the bedroom.  
  
New Years Eve is spent at the lab, not by force, but by choice. No one had made plans this year, so they all agreed to work that night and have a small party there at midnight. Luckily, the rest of Vegas seemed to have dates and not one call had come in that night. Catherine has Lindsey for the first half of the shift, the babysitter is going to pick her up after midnight. Most of that time Lindsey had spent either following Catherine and Warrick or fascinated with Sara.  
  
Sitting in the break room, Sara is resting and reading a file when Lindsey comes in, accompanied by Warrick. The young girl walks up to her and asks if she can feel her stomach, intrigued by the concept of a baby in there. Sara agrees and the small girl places a hand on her, waiting for something to happen.  
  
"Is it sleeping?" Lindsey asks, confused when nothing happens.  
  
"Might be. Let see if we can wake him. Shall we?" Sara smiles conspiratorially at the girl and gets a grin in response. Pushing on the right side, where she can feel him, Sara manages to get the baby going, if only enough initially to appease the young girl.  
  
Lindsey lets out a squeal at the feeling of movement under her hand and places an ear next to it. "Can I hear him?"  
  
"Probably not, baby." Catherine says from the door, where she had been watching, amused. Normally Sara never would have let Lindsey this close to her, much less let her rest a head on her. "Linds, let Sara be."  
  
"It's fine, Catherine. She wasn't bothering me. Besides, this kid needs to be on my schedule at some point. He is already sleeping during the night and up during the day."  
  
"You mean you don't have him trained already to be on your schedule Sara?" Warrick asks from the corner, smiling at the young woman.  
  
"No Warrick I don't. And let me tell you, I wish I did. I cant figure it out, its like he really doesn't want me to sleep."  
  
"I thought you didn't sleep anyway."  
  
Sara just gives him an exasperated look and turns to the door as Grissom, Nick and Greg walk in.  
  
"You guys ready? We have about a minute," Nick says and turns on the TV to Dick Clark.  
  
They all stand watching as the countdown winds through 30 seconds, then 20 and finally the last 10. Lindsey counts down loudly with Warrick as the last five seconds of 2002 wind down into nothing but memories. As the ball hits and an explosion of fireworks erupts and the room breaks into a chorus of "Happy New Year".  
  
Grissom leans into Sara, whispers the time honored words in her ear, and kisses her deeply. Parting, they stare at each other before Nicky interrupts, pulling Sara into a careful hug.  
  
"Happy New Year Sar," he says as they part and places a quick kiss on her lips. "You deserve it."  
  
"Happy New Year. You do, too." She hugs him again, holding on more tightly to her friend. Pulling away, they share a smile.  
  
Two days later, Sara and Grissom are again sitting in the sonogram room, the lights nearly off. This time, however, Sara is not surprised about the cool gel on her stomach, or the slimy feel of it. Watching the screen, the picture comes into focus more quickly, the baby now taking up all the space available, and making more room as it goes.  
  
Sticking her tongue out, Megan maneuvers the wand around, taking pictures and nodding happily.  
  
"Ok guys, everything looks right on track for your due date. The baby is the right size; all the organs and appendages look good. So, do you want to know the sex?"  
  
Sara quickly glances at Grissom; they had discussed it, but she needs to confirm. He nods and she responds in the affirmative to the doctor.  
  
"Ok. Congratulations, it's a boy."  
  
"A.boy? You're sure?" Grissom asks.  
  
Looking back at the screen Megan confirms. "Oh yeah, no doubt about it."  
  
"Thank you, Megan," Sara says, and finally gets up off the table, pulling her shirt down.  
  
"No problem. But one thing. Sara, you need to gain some more weight. You were going strong at the beginning, but haven't gained much since your last visit. How about five pounds by next month?"  
  
"Ok. I'll do my best."  
  
"Good, see you in 4 weeks."  
  
They say their goodbyes, gather the new pictures, and head out the office door to the Tahoe, each lost in their own thoughts.  
  
"A boy." They both say at the same time, and promptly laugh.  
  
"Well, at least we were calling him the right sex." Sara comments.  
  
"Yeah. I guess we can tell the team, and try to pick a name, I get the feeling it will take the next 4 months." He grins at her and lifts his eyebrows.  
  
"It will not, but let's be clear now. There will be no juniors around our house. One Gil Grissom is plenty, I don't need two."  
  
"Agreed. Are you ok with going in now?" he asks and starts the car.  
  
"Yeah, that's fine. I can brush up on my lab work, maybe have Greg show me the new equipment if he's there."  
  
"Ok."  
He sits in the truck at work, contemplating. Finally looking at the clock, he notices the time: one hour before her shift starts. It's been to long since he has contacted her; it's time to make himself known, he's ready. Joey realizes that once he contacts her again they will start looking for him, and he doesn't need that. He will have a few hours to pack up what he needs and find other accommodations; They will trace him to the halfway house. In hindsight Joey is happy that he didn't succeed in killing her; they have a second chance now, a chance to be happy together. She will be his, no matter what.  
She is sitting on a lab stool, carefully listening to Greg explain the new software for the Mass Spec machine when Nicky pops his head in.  
  
"Hey Sar. How did the appointment go?" Nick asks. Greg's head pops up, he obviously had forgotten.  
  
"Hey, yeah, Sara. Weren't you supposed to get pictures?" Like the rest of the team, Greg has really gotten into Sara's pregnancy. He is curious about everything, frequently peppering her with questions that she sometimes had no answer to, sometimes surprising her with a piece of information he has read.  
  
"Yeah, I have them. In my locker." She smiles at the men and turns her attention back to the machine.  
  
Nick gives Greg a look and approaches her, wrapping his strong arms around her shoulders. Leaning in, he whispers in her ear. "Come on Sara, I want to see. If we wait for everyone to get here, it could take forever. Plus I know you know the sex."  
  
"You know nothing." She stands and pulls herself out of his grip, pretending to ignore him. Sara is afraid if she looks at her friend, she will spill, and she and Grissom have agreed to tell the team together.  
  
"Yeah I do. I have 5 sisters, Sara; I'm not that clueless about the process. Twenty week ultrasound you can find out. And I know you, you would want to know. Spill it."  
  
Finally she turns to look her friend. "Grissom and I agreed.."  
  
"Come ON Sara, you're killing me. At least let's see the pictures." At that moment Nick's pager goes off and he reads the display.  
  
"Fine, you win. I'll grab the pictures.You have no patience Nicky, you know that?"  
  
"None whatsoever. Hustle, mom. I gotta get my lab report and meet you back here."  
  
"All right, all right. But pregnant women don't hustle."  
  
"Yeah, yeah."  
  
Twenty minutes later Sara is sitting in the break room with the two men, one on each side of her as she points out parts of the baby on the grainy picture.  
  
"So what is it?" Nick asks , smiling at her.  
  
Sara merely rolls her eyes at him and puts the pictures down. "I'm not going to tell you Nick; get over it."  
  
"Ok then, let try a different tactic. Have you been craving certain foods?" He sits down in the chair across from her, assuming a position for interrogation.  
  
"What? Why do you.." She sighs loudly before deciding to humor him. "Yes, I have."  
  
"Which ones?"  
  
Sara shakes her head before replying. "All right, I hate to even admit this, but I would kill for a hamburger right now."  
  
"What? Ohhh that's too good, the resident vegetarian wants a burger. Wait till Warrick hears that!" Nicky looks at Greg and both men start laughing outright.  
  
"It's not funny! Okay, maybe it is a little, but come on, cut me some slack."  
  
"Sorry. Sorry. I bet it's a boy then, my sisters craved meat with their boys."  
  
"Wait a second, you are basing the sex of my child on what food I'm craving and your sisters' pregnancies? That's not really scientific there, buddy."  
  
"It never is." He waggles his eyebrows at her as Grissom, Warrick and Catherine all walk into the room.  
  
Catherine is the first to notice the ultrasound pictures and promptly leans over Sara to look at them. Sara hands her the pictures after a few moments; Cath hanging over her shoulder is getting on her nerves. Warrick walks around the table and stands behind Catherine, smiling.  
  
"You know what it is?" Warrick asks, even though he knows the answer.  
  
"Yes, we know." Is Grissom's typically short and obtuse reply. Warrick hadn't asked for the sex.  
  
"Are you going to tell us?"  
  
"Yes," he again replies with few words.  
  
"Well? What's the sex?" This comes from Nick now, who is staring Sara down.  
  
Sara glances at Grissom with a "you are bad" expression on her face before speaking. "XY."  
  
"A boy, that's great!" Nick says and gives her a wide smile.  
  
After a round of congratulations, Grissom hands out assignments. Sara and Nick are on a 419, Grissom and Warrick are on another homicide and Catherine gets a missing person. Grissom has been careful of late to be sure he doesn't assign Sara to all his cases; they don't need any sign of impropriety, regardless of whether or not people are aware of their personal status.  
  
Nick is walking out with Sara when he looks down and realizes he doesn't have his badge with him.  
  
"Damn it. Sara, I'll meet you out there, I left my badge." He quickly tosses her the keys and turns around.  
  
Sara merely shakes her head at Nick's retreating form and walks out the front doors, the chill in the air assaulting the sensitive skin on her face. She pauses momentarily to look into the clear night sky and observe the stars.  
  
'Beautiful,' she thinks, and continues to the vehicle.  
  
He sees her come out of the lab doors and it seems that his heart stops. She is more beautiful than he remembers. Her face looks rounder, like she has gained some weight; her hair is 3 inches longer than when he saw her last and a bit lighter. Letting his eyes wander down from her face, Joey gets the surprise of his life: she's pregnant. Sucking in a deep breath, he fights to control the rage that surges through him. He knows she is still seeing that guy, Grissom he thinks his name is. Are they married? How could she do this to him? Allow herself to get pregnant with another man's child while he was away. How could his Sara do this? Joey decides not to wait for her reaction to his gift, he needs to leave now before he does something rash. He needs to go think. He starts the truck and slowly drives off, Joey needs to rethink his plan, a baby adds a new dimension.  
  
After dropping her case in the back, she walks to the driver's side, quickly opening the door and getting into the imposing vehicle. Putting the key in the ignition, Sara finally looks up and out the window. The sight that greets her, however, causes her heart to sink into her chest and for a moment she stops breathing.  
tbc.......... 


	13. Chapter 13

AN: Rock on! Another chapter so soon, see how I love you guys! Keep up the reviews they keep me going. Thanks to everyone, you know who you are by now.  
  
Joey's back, and now they know...  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
Swallowing the lump in her throat and unconsciously touching the baby, Sara gets out and eyes the small bouquet of pink and purple lilies. Looking around, she sees no unknown cars and reaches out to grab them before snatching her hand back.  
  
'Dammit, Sidle: gloves. You know better than that,' she thinks and moves to the back of the vehicle, snatching a pair and returning to the front warily. Sara is hoping when she looks again the flowers will be gone, but they are not; they remain, mocking her, bringing back memories she fought so hard to control.  
  
Reaching out, Sara grabs the flowers carefully by the stems. There are four flowers, two of each color bound with a white ribbon, which winds through a note.  
  
'Maybe it's a mistake, maybe someone put these on the wrong car. Grissom would know better than to give me lilies.' Sara runs through all the other options before opening the note, and finding her worst fears are realized.  
  
'You are my one true love, Sara. I'm back; we can finally be together.'  
  
"Oh my God, no." Sara's hand on her stomach quickly turns into a protective embrace with her whole arm. She has trouble breathing, and everything is getting fuzzy, the edges of her vision blurring. To keep from falling, Sara leans against the Tahoe and slides down the side, sitting as gently as she can on the ground, the flowers forgotten and dropped next to her. The cold Vegas air barely registers with her; she hadn't grabbed a coat and the wind is whipping around her. She brings her knees up and places her head between them in an attempt to keep from fainting.  
  
'It cant be. He's supposed to be locked up, gone, for years. How? Why? Why now?' The thoughts are swirling in her head and Sara doesn't hear the footsteps or someone calling out her name.  
  
"Sara? Hey Sar? Where you at?" Nick calls out concerned. He can see the drivers side door open, but no sign of Sara as he approaches the vehicle. Coming around the end of the truck he sees her, she is sitting on the cold ground, shivering, her head locked between her knees. Lying innocently next to her are the flowers. Nick immediately recognizes them and panics.  
  
"Sara! Are you ok?" He kneels in front of her and touches her arm lightly. Nick is shocked and dismayed when she pulls away from him, bringing her head up with fear in her brown eyes.  
  
"Sara." he whispers and she softens upon recognizing him.  
  
"Nick..I came out and." Is all she can get out before pointing to the discarded flowers.  
  
"Ok, ok. First let's get you inside; you're cold. I'll take care of it." He helps her up and grabs his phone, quickly calling Warrick and telling him to meet them at the door without explanation.  
  
Wrapping an arm around her for warmth as much as support, Nick barely hears her speak, but catches two words. "He's back."  
  
Guiding her into the lab after giving Warrick the rundown, Nick sits her down in Grissom's office and quickly fires off two calls. One 911 page he sends to Grissom, Nick isn't in the mood to search the lab for him, and one call to Brass, for whom he leaves a voice mail. Once that is accomplished, he turns his attention back to Sara who has one arm wrapped around herself and is still shivering, as much from the cold as shock. She is staring into nowhere, her eyes glazed over, one hand still on her stomach.  
  
"Sara, Grissom is on his way. It's ok." He stands in front of her, rubbing his hands up and down her arms.  
  
Finally she looks at him, really looks at him, with a sad smile. "No, its not."  
  
Nick is about to speak again when Grissom opens his door, confused as to why Nick would 911 him back to his office. Seeing Sara, he knows why.  
  
"Sara?" He questions. Nick moves out of the way, allowing Grissom access to the woman who has spoken only a handful of words.  
  
Sara can only manage to look up at Grissom, she cant seem to speak.  
  
"We have a problem." Nick says. Quickly, Nick runs down what happened in the parking lot, and that Warrick has the flowers now and is processing them and the note.  
  
"Can't be, Nick. Cant be. He is in the psychiatric center." He is trying to convince himself as much as Nick.  
  
"I know. I called Brass at any rate, he should know."  
  
"Good. Thank you, Nick. Go help Warrick will you? And get back to me as soon as you can."  
  
"No problem, we'll figure this out."  
  
Nick closes the door on his way out, leaving Grissom and Sara in peace. Slowly Grissom reaches out and touches her face, pushing some hair back.  
  
"Sara? You ok?"  
  
She looks up at him and takes a deep breath. Sara refuses to break; Joey Harrington did that to her once, never again. "I'm ok, just shocked. He's supposed to be put away Grissom. Gone for good.out of our lives."  
  
"Maybe its not him." Even as he says it, Grissom doesn't believe a word he just said.  
  
"Come on, we both know it is. I don't need fingerprints to tell me that. I just want to know how."  
Nick walks into the lab and finds Warrick sitting at a computer, waiting for the prints to download.  
  
"You get those prints lifted already?"  
  
"Yeah, Sara made it easy for me by not touching it. I grabbed one clear set and." As he speaks the print appears on the right side of the screen in blue. On the left is Harrington's prints from booking, in yellow. A few swift clicks on the keyboard and they have a match.  
  
"Shit." Nick says slowly, presses his hands flat on the countertop, and turns to look at his friend. "How?"  
  
tbc....... 


	14. Chapter 14

WIACCD, Chapter 14  
  
Notes: Sorry this took soooo long guys, RL really got in the way lately. But just for that I'll post another chapter in the next day or two. Thanks for your patience, I really appreciate it to no end. Review to show me you don't hate me. ;-)  
"Clerical error is how." Brass announces some time later to the group.  
  
When he received Nick's voice mail, the captain had immediately gotten on the phone to the psychiatric center. Several not so veiled threats later he had them physically check, and Joey Harrington was nowhere to be seen. After some yelling by Jim, he had found out half of the reason why Joey is out, though no one seemed to be able to tell him exactly what had gone wrong. Two hours later, he has half answers and not good news.  
  
"Excuse me?" This comes from Grissom, whose expression barely contains the anger he is feeling.  
  
"Someone pulled the wrong file, the numbers got switched and he was let go instead of the guy who was supposed to. They were pretty vague about it. I contacted the halfway house he was assigned to, no one has seen him since this morning when he left for work. I have a car stationed there waiting for him." He watches the group digest this.  
  
"How long?" Sara finally asks.  
  
"Four weeks."  
  
"He's been out four weeks already?" She is stunned; this is the first she heard from the man who turned her life upside down.  
  
"Yeah. I've already arranged protection for you when you aren't at work or a scene, but I can only spare one man at a time, we're short staffed as it is."  
  
Quietly she nods, the reality finally sinking in: Joey Harrington is back. Sara isn't sure how she should feel: scared, angry, confused; she is all that, but at the same time determined not to fall into the trap like she did last time. She refuses to become the victim; she refuses to let him control her, to let this get to her. At the same time, she has other considerations now and can't take her safety lightly. It's a balancing act and she is determined not to fall.  
  
Grissom watches as several emotions float over her face, and he reaches out and grabs her hand. She looks up at him with a sad expression.  
  
"We'll get him, Sara. I promise." This comes from Warrick, who is sitting directly across from her.  
  
"I know you do. But there is only so much that can be done. It's a big city and a person can easily get lost in it."  
  
"This is my number one priority." Brass tells the young woman, who seems to be taking this all in stride.  
  
"Thanks Brass. I'm sure he'll appear at some point, we just have to get him when he does."  
  
"Yes, which is why you go nowhere alone. Understand?" Grissom tells her sternly.  
  
"Yeah. I understand," she responds quietly, her head down, eyes on her stomach. "But I.."  
  
"NO buts, Sara. This is non-negotiable," Nick finally chimes in.  
  
"I know, I know. I just don't want this affecting me like it did last time. I want to be in control."  
  
"You can still be in control and be safe; we'll make sure of that. You can lean on us Sar." Nick looks at the group and immediately gets nods.  
  
"Thank you." She looks up at them, her eyes glistening with unshed tears.  
  
Grissom holds her hand a little tighter and speaks to the group. "Ok, here's how we are going to handle this. Everything works as usual, except Sara has no solo cases and I'm sorry Cath, but she doesn't go out with just you either. Not that I don't have faith in your abilities, but I just feel safer if she was with one of the guys."  
  
Catherine just nods, understanding.  
  
"You guys be careful, as Nick is acutely aware, this guys has no remorse for hurting others. Don't take the easiest path to scenes unless you have to, and keep your eyes peeled. You guys know how to do this, be on guard. I don't want anyone else injured or killed by this guy. Your spare time is spent trying to find him."  
  
"Got it Gris." Warrick nods and gets up. "I'm going to work with Brass on the halfway house."  
  
"Wait up man, I'll go with, it's a slow night." Nick also gets up but not before turning to Sara and kissing the top of her head. He has no reassurances for her, and Nick doesn't think he ever will until Harrington is dead.  
  
By shift's end, there has been no sign of Harrington; he never came back to the house and a quick check revealed his things are gone also.  
  
"Nothing Warrick! God DAMN IT! He just disappeared into the night. The construction company said he brought the truck back and got on the bus to go home as usual, except he didn't go home. He could be at any of hundreds of hotels!" Nick slams one fist down on the counter, shaking several pens and beakers. Frustration is evident on his face.  
  
Warrick puts his hand on the other man's shoulder. "Calm down Nick."  
  
"I..I cant calm down. She doesn't deserve this Warrick. Neither one of them do. They are finally happy, going to have a baby, a normal life, and then HE comes back." Nick stops and just stares into space. "Its just not right."  
  
"You think I don't know that, man? You think I'm not frustrated too? This is hitting all of us. We're all worried about her."  
  
Nick looks up guilty. "I'm sorry. I need to be more constructive, find him before he gets any closer to her."  
  
Sara is listening to Brass talk. Well, more accurately she can see is mouth moving, but the sound doesn't seem to be reaching her ears. She can't concentrate on him; her thoughts are flittering all over the place, she cant seem to pin one down long enough to consider its meaning. She feels like she has been reduced to primal instinct and thoughts. Logic and rationalizations will get her nowhere now, that which she has relied her life on, that which she depends on, is useless. She learned that in her last encounter with Joey Harrington: he couldn't be reasoned with, wouldn't listen to anyone. His determination to posses her overrides everything, something her rational mind can't comprehend.  
  
"Sara?" Grissom finally notices the faraway look on her face; she hasn't been listening, unusual for Sara. Getting no response from her, Grissom looks at Brass and then back to the young woman, who hasn't moved an inch.  
  
"Sara?" he asks again, this time touching her upper arm. Finally she acknowledges him.  
  
"Yeah?.Oh, I'm sorry Brass. I wasn't really paying attention."  
  
"I gathered that. Just.be careful. Your man will be on you whenever you aren't at work, even if Gil is with you."  
  
She nods quietly and stands, Grissom following her closely behind. Once they are clear of Brass' office, he stops in front of her.  
  
"Are you ok?" Concern is etched on his face. It's killing him that he seems unable to help her, to stop this from happening. All he can do is offer half hearted reassurances and use every arsenal at his disposal to find Harrington.  
  
She looks at him with a blank expression. "No, Grissom, for once.no. I'm not ok, this is not ok. I.can't even think, I can barely form a logical thought. I'm scared, terrified even. He almost killed Nick last time, Gris, I won't be responsible for that again. Hell, he almost killed me. I don't know what to do, I feel like.I don't even know what I feel. Nothing, its like I'm numb. Sure the fear is there, but nothing else." As she talks, the words tumble out faster, the tears she had been holding back come to the front and threaten to spill down her cheeks.  
  
"Sara."  
  
"No, no goddamn it! Don't coddle me, don't treat me like a child. I don't need it, I don't want it." Her eyes flash in anger, the brown of her eyes deepening in color.  
  
"What do you want Sara? What do you want me to do? Tell me and I'll do it." He is confused by her swift switch in emotional state.  
  
"I want." She stops to consider this for a moment. She isn't sure. "I want you to make it all stop. Just.make it stop."  
  
He looks at the woman he loves and his heart breaks. She looks so small and fragile, the usual Sara defiance and confidence, those things that she had only recently regained after last time, are again gone. Quickly he gathers her into his arms, pulling her as close as the baby will allow, not caring who sees.  
  
"I promise you Sara, we WILL find him. This is not an option." He feels her tense body relax a bit in his embrace and her head rests on his shoulder.  
  
"I know you'll try, Gris. I know you all will. But will it be enough?"  
  
"Yes." He is firm with his answer. He hadn't been lying, they weren't the best lab in the country for nothing. If anyone can find Harrington, they can.  
  
tbc.............soon 


	15. Chapter 15

Notes: I'm so sorry for the slow updates lately, I promise to try to be better in the future. But as a consolation prize.how's 2 chapters today sound? Goooood, I thought that might help.  
  
Thank you everyone for being so patient, RL has been very very busy lately, just got back from a huge trip to Vegas and its finally slowing some. Remember to tip your waitress or review your writer! More soon I promise!  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
For the third time in a week, Nick and Warrick comb through Joey Harringtons former residence at the halfway house, looking for any clue, any indication of where he may be hiding at. Another round of exhaustive interviews with other residents reveals that no one knows anything; Harrington had kept to himself, working whenever possible, a model for released offenders.  
  
The two men slide into the Tahoe, both frustrated, neither saying much until Nick breaks the tension.  
  
"Ok, ok. We have to think about this not so logically. Think like him. You're obsessed with Sara, what do you do? How do you contact her?"  
  
Warrick scrunches his face in confusion. "I don't know, Nick."  
  
"Come on, man. Think."  
  
"Nick, I don't know. I suppose you would want to be close, but not so close that we could see him."  
  
"Right..but where?"  
  
Sara comes into the lab and swiftly picks up her mail from the slot, grabbing Grissom's, and a large envelope in Nick's slot also. Her protection had left when she entered the building; there is no need for a cop on her when she is surrounded by them. Dropping Grissom's mail on his desk, she notices he isn't there yet; he had come in a bit early to get an experiment started. She continues the rounds, working her way into the locker room where she finds Catherine getting ready. It has been a week since the flowers, and it has been an incredibly tense week, she felt on edge all the time. While there has been no further contact, memories have been enough to keep Sara wondering, and scared. She has returned to the habit of jumping when the phone rings it has Sara feeling not like herself and she hates it.  
  
"Hey Sara. How's Junior?" Catherine asks, her tone light.  
  
"Fine, still kicking up a storm, though. Forget science, I think we have a soccer player on our hands."  
  
Catherine laughs lightly. "I'm sure Gil will love that."  
  
Sara just shrugs and removes her coat, grabbing her badge out of the locker. Finally turning to the mail she flips through some reports she had been waiting for before coming to a regular letter envelope, her name and the labs address printed neatly on the front, no return address. Fear courses through her and the previously quiet baby now begins moving in response to her tensing up.  
  
"Cath," she calls out quietly, staring at the envelope with fear.  
  
"Yeah?" The older woman turns to her and recognizes the look on her face. Her eyes follow Sara's down to her hands, where she holds a white envelope.  
  
Catherine quickly grabs a pair of gloves from her locker and takes three steps to Sara. Touching her upper arm lightly, Catherine takes the letter from her hands, turning it over and inspecting it before carefully opening the sealed flap. Inside lies a plain white sheet of paper, which Catherine pulls out and unfolds. Written in the same neat handwriting as the address, is a note.  
  
"Sara, had forgiven you for shooting me. You were confused. Those people had you convinced I was the bad guy, that you didn't love me. I know you did. You have to, I would do anything for you, anything. But then you got pregnant Sara, how could you do that? How could you do that to me? How could you allow yourself? I don't understand. In time I think I can come to accept the baby, it is a part of you, and that means something. A baby wasn't in my plans for us, but things happen, accidents.happen Sara. They still have you confused, don't they? They have you convinced that he loves you, that HE would do anything for you. Would he kill for you? Cause I would."  
  
The last line sends a shiver down Catherine's back and she looks at Sara who is a shade of white she didn't think possible.  
  
"Sara, sit down. Now."  
  
Quietly she obeys the command, not really thinking about it. Her mind is on the letter, the threat actually. Would he do it? Would he kill for her in some misguided attempted to win her over?  
  
'Oh, God. He would.' she thinks and takes some deep breaths, trying to stop herself from becoming nauseous. 'Grissom, would he kill Grissom? He knows about the baby.hes SEEN me.' The thoughts fly through her head and that's when she loses the battle with her nerves. Standing up, Sara rushes into the bathroom and expels her lunch. Breathing deeply, Sara flushes and sits back against the tile. Shortly thereafter she hears the door open and Catherine snap her phone shut.  
  
Catherine had seen it coming; Sara had gone from ghostly white to almost a green shade in an instant. She had put the letter back in the envelope and placed it in her jacket pocket for the time being until she could get it into the labs, quickly shooting off a call to Grissom. She has to leave him a message when voicemail had picked up. She opens the door and walks into the bathroom, quickly finding Sara in the farthest stall, sitting on the floor, shaking.  
  
Quietly, Catherine kneels in front of her, pushing a section of hair off her face. She grabs one of Sara's hands in hers and squeezes; the younger woman hasn't even acknowledged her presence.  
  
"Sara?"  
  
Finally, Sara looks at Catherine and she sees fear in her friend's face.  
  
"I." She starts but swiftly stops. "I cant say it, cause if I say it Cath, then it might come true. Harrington might kill someone. Grissom, he could kill Grissom. Oh god." She puts her head back on the tile.  
  
"Shhh." Catherine sits next to her and pulls Sara into a tight embrace, her arms wrapped around the brunettes slim shoulders, Sara's head resting under her chin.  
  
"Let it out, Sara," she whispers, and shortly thereafter feels and hears hitching sobs emanating from her.  
  
Sara accepts Catherine's offer, and for the first time really cries. She can't hold it in any longer; she tried to be strong. The thought of Harrington doing anything to Grissom, or the baby is the last straw. This is an overt threat, not like last time where it came as a surprise. Past experience has shown her that he is not to be taken lightly; he means what he says. When she finally has no more tears to shed, Sara lifts her head from Catherine and leans against the cool tile.  
  
"Thank you, Catherine."  
  
Catherine just shrugs. "I'd ask how you are but its apparent you are far from fine. Sara, I'd like to think I have something grand and inspiring to say, or something that will make you feel better and take away the terror, but I don't. What I do have is a promise that I will do everything I can to make sure you and the baby are safe. I know that promise might not mean much, but know it's sincere. I can't even begin to imagine what you are feeling and are going through, but if you need me, I'll be there for you. You need to take care of yourself, and let us worry about Harrington."  
  
Again Catherine grabs her hand.  
  
Sara nods and looks at Catherine. "How Catherine? How do I do that? I can't pretend its not happening. I can't pretend I didn't see that note, that the flowers never happened. I can't go back to 2 weeks ago, before I knew, when everything was finally on track. I can't keep him safe."  
  
Catherine wonders for a moment who she means, but lets it go. "You have something wonderful to look forward to Sara. In four months you and Grissom will have a beautiful baby, and by then this will all be over. You need to concentrate on that, you can't ignore this Sara, you can't. You need to stay vigilant, but at the same time, you can do what every other pregnant woman does: go shopping, pick out patterns, paint a room, choose a name: anything but Gil, please, go to Lamaze, wonder how in the world an eight pound baby is supposed to come out."  
  
Catherine smiles and carefully touches Sara stomach. "You need something good to focus on.and this is it. You can't let Harrington invade this too. Don't let him, cause if you do, then he wins."  
  
Sara considers the woman's words and nods. "I'll try."  
  
"That's all I ask. Lets get up off the floor, my ass is cold."  
  
Sara laughs lightly and gets up. As they are brushing themselves off, the sound of Grissom's booming voice in the hallway gets their attention. He is calling Sara's name.  
  
Sara opens the door and walks out, almost running right into him. "I'm here."  
  
Grissom looks her over quickly, she is pale and still shaking somewhat. "Sara, Catherine called me, something about a note. What's going on?"  
  
At that point Catherine taps her jacket pocket, not willing to touch it with ungloved hands. "I have it here. Let's get it to the lab and print it."  
  
"What does the note say?" When neither woman answers, he stares down Catherine. "What does it say?" he repeats a bit more deliberately, reaching out and touching Sara's cheek, carefully stroking it with his thumb.  
  
"When we get to the lab Grissom, not now." Catherine turns to Sara. "Grab Brass, will you?"  
  
"Yeah, be right there." She looks at Grissom and gives him a saddened smile, that he can't hold her now, not like she wants him to, there are still too many people from the day shift wandering around. Instead he returns her smile and she turns to walk to the PD; Brass needs to know about this.  
  
"What's wrong?" Grissom asks Catherine, knowing perfectly well she wouldn't have gotten rid of Sara if it wasn't bad.  
  
"She doesn't need to see this again. She got sick the first time." Catherine states and walks into the lab. Donning gloves and opening the envelope, she flattens the letter so Grissom can easily read it.  
  
Grissom quickly skims the letter, astonished at the madness of the author. "I.dont believe this Cath." The older man takes a few steps away from her and starts pacing, running one hand through his grey curls.  
  
"Sara cant take much more of this, she shouldn't have to."  
  
"I know, Grissom. We will do everything in our power to find him. Everything." She lays one hand on his shoulder, a mixture of determination, anger and compassion in her eyes. "You focus on her, and keep her focused on other things."  
  
"Yeah, thanks." He smiles at Catherine as Sara returns with Brass following close behind. Quickly, Grissom takes one step to her and pulls her into his arms, more for his own reassurance than for hers. After a moment he releases his hold and looks in her eyes, the brown orbs not revealing the thoughts behind them  
  
"You ok?" he finally asks.  
  
"Yeah, I'm ok." At his dubious look she continues. "Maybe not great, but I'm ok."  
  
He nods and tells Catherine he shouldn't handle evidence collection for obvious reasons. "You know what to do; I trust you Cath."  
  
Catherine reads between the lines: this is the one case they can't afford to screw up, because the consequences are unthinkable.  
  
tbc......... 


	16. Chapter 16

Y'all know the title, and the author, and the rating...lets move on shall we?  
  
Here is the second chapter for today, as promised! Thank you again!  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
While wandering the streets, he sees what he has been looking for,, a car, something to simply get around in. He doesn't need fancy, besides he only has $500 to spend on it. It has been a week since he sent the flowers, two days since he sent the letter; she should have received it by now. The thought of her thinking about him, wondering what he is doing gives him a high. He feels buoyed by the idea that right now Sara's thoughts are on him, on what he could be doing, if he is thinking about her. It makes him feel powerful, in control, like he was before she sent him to that hellhole.  
  
He didn't belong there, the ward was for crazy people; he isn't crazy, he's in love. They didn't understand that there; they thought he was crazy like the rest. He spoke to his mandated psychologist every week, but never felt like explaining his actions; he saw no need. Some people don't understand the concept of the kind of a love that takes over your life, that consumes your every thought, your every decision. Everything he has done has been for her. Everything.  
  
Catherine slowly approaches Grissom's open office door. She can see the older man with his head in his hands, thinking. Catherine pauses without making a sound, taking a moment to digest what she sees in her friend. He's scared, terrified is a better word, about Sara. Before Harrington made an appearance Catherine could count on one hand how many times she had seen Grissom like this.. One such occasion was the Strip Strangler case, when Sara had offered herself as bait. He had been furious with her, but under that Catherine had seen the fear, fear that something would happen to the woman he loved, even if he hadn't admitted the feelings then. This is different, the stakes are much higher now; they are in a relationship and Sara is carrying his son. Just the thought makes Catherine cringe and she has to hold back tears; honestly the stakes can't get any higher than they are  
  
Swallowing, she knocks on the door and enters at Grissom's nod. He hasn't looked at her yet.  
  
"Gil, the prints are a match, Harrington," she says softly and sits down. In an instant his look of fear is replaced by anger. She jumps when Grissom slams one hand down on his desk, shaking several jars.  
  
"We expected this Gil.."  
  
"I know Cath, but that doesn't make me any less angry. Someone's error, some moron's error put him out on the street and now we can't even find him. You checked the postage, trace didn't find anything unusual?"  
  
"No, it was mailed from the strip, not really helpful. For crazy, he's pretty good at evading the cops."  
  
"They all are, Cath. He knows if he gets caught, he'll never see her again. He's psychotic not dumb." Sighing, he pinches the bridge of his nose.  
  
Catherine is about to speak when his quiet voice stops her.  
  
"What if he gets her Cath? She can't fight back like she could before." She can hear his voice trembling.  
  
"Grissom, last time she was also fresh out of the hospital and in pain. Sara is a tough girl, and I think you would be surprised what mothers will do, how much pain they can inflict when protecting their children. It won't come to that."  
  
"She was protected last time and armed and it did no good. None. I can't handle losing her Catherine, her or the baby. That letter was threatening; I don't think it's about possessing her anymore, I think it's about making sure no one else can. What if." He swallows hard and Catherine can see red rimming his eyes. "What if he finally kills her?"  
  
Catherine quickly gets up and walks around the desk, pulling Grissom into a hug, letting him cry on her shoulder. She seems to be the person to cry on today and has no problem with it. Gil needs to get out his fear, let someone else take the burden for a moment, and this is something he could never say to Sara. After several minutes he pulls away and puts back on the Grissom stone face that everyone is accustomed to.  
  
Touching his shoulder, Catherine finally speaks with authority.  
  
"We won't let that happen."  
  
He looks at her and for one moment appears believes her; this team would do anything to protect its youngest member. But is it enough to want to do it he wonders aloud.  
  
Sara walks to DNA, hoping to find Greg, maybe continue their lesson from earlier. After Catherine had confirmed the prints, Sara asked her to tell Grissom so she could walk and clear her head. And so she had, making a circle of the labs and the PD, going outside into the chilly Vegas air only once, knowing if Grissom found out she went outside alone he would be angry. She rationalized that she was surround by cops; Joey wouldn't be so stupid. So now she finishes her loop, ending in the DNA lab, finding no one. Sighing, she sits at Greg's stool and idly stares at the machines, her thoughts wandering. The entire walk she had been fighting the Sara that reared its ugly head the last time Joey appeared, the Sara that sunk into a deep depression and ever so briefly considered killing herself. Pursing her lips, she carefully runs a hand along her belly. If she had gone through with it, this baby would never have been. Grissom would never know the joys of fatherhood. She wouldn't know the joys of internal bruising at the hands of her son. 'Her son' she thinks and smiles before a frown replaces it, nothing can happen to him, nothing. The potential of any harm coming to her unborn child almost brings her to tears, and she feels that familiar pull on her consciousness again.  
  
Driving home that morning, Grissom covertly looks at Sara, whose eyes are focused on the sun, quickly rising over the desert. He can't tell what she is thinking, and he doesn't like it. Deciding to take Catherine's advice, he breaks the comfortable silence; he needs to get her mind on other things.  
  
"Nathaniel."  
  
Sara slowly turns her head to him with a confused expression. "Excuse me?"  
  
Nodding at her lower body he continues. "We are down to four months to go. Better start debating names now, might take that long." He winks at her and she laughs at his reference to her earlier comment about picking a name.  
  
"Ok, but you've been sitting there for 15 minutes and that's the best you can come up with?"  
  
"Ok, ok. Albert."  
  
"Oh no. Let's lay some ground rules." As he pulls the car to a stop in the driveway she gets out and waves at the car following them. "No scientists and no literature names, I don't want the poor thing scarred from day one."  
  
"You really are narrowing the field here Sara." She merely shakes her head and raises one eyebrow as he opens the front door. "Ok smart ass, you have any ideas?"  
  
"Mmmmm, not yet. Maybe we should wait until he's born, we might pick something and then he won't look like whatever we chose."  
  
"That's not very prepared of you." They move into the house and he wraps his long arms around her, nuzzling his face into the crook of her neck.  
  
"Yeah well, sometimes you can't prepare for everything," she practically whispers, he can tell is breath on her neck is distracting.  
  
"Mmmm, that's not very Sara Sidle," he whispers back and starts trailing light kisses on her collarbone and neck, working up to her jaw.  
  
"No, no its not." She closes her eyes and enjoys the sensation of his soft lips on her jaw, working back to her ear where he lightly tugs on the lobe. That is her undoing and she spins in his grasp, her hands behind his neck, playing with the fine hairs. Leaning in, she kisses him fiercely, forcing his lips open with her tongue. He pulls her into him as tight as the baby will allow and returns the kiss, running his hands through her dark hair. After several moments she pulls back and smiling pulls him into their bedroom, forgetting everything except this moment and what she feels now, love.  
  
Sara wakes several hours later in the same position she fell asleep in, curled to one side facing Grissom, her head now on a pillow. She had recently made the mistake of sleeping almost the entire night on her back, her preferred position, and had been terrified when she woke up and couldn't feel her feet. After a call to the doctor and subsequently feeling stupid, Sara had found out the hard way that sleeping on your back pushes the baby into the spinal cord and veins, causing numbness similar to when you cut off circulation to the arm. Since then, she makes sure to fall asleep on her side. Opening her eyes against the waning sun coming in through the slats in the blinds, she finds Grissom already awake and again talking to the baby.  
  
"Hey, morning," she says sleepily and smiles.  
  
"Hey, morning. How're you doing?"  
  
"Fine, though I am seriously beginning to wonder if I should be concerned about being overthrown."  
  
"What? Oh, we were discussing names, figured I would consult him." Grissom brings his head up to her and gives her a deep kiss.  
  
"Mmmm, that's nice of you. Any conclusions?"  
  
"We'll get back to you."  
  
She raises an eyebrow and curls closer into him, wrapping one arm across his chest. Grissom watches her eyes blink to open and runs a hand down her arm, linking his fingers with hers. "Sara. We didn't talk much yesterday. Are you.ok?"  
  
"Yeah, actually I am. I mean, yes I'm scared and terrified and on edge. But at the same time, I'm determined not to let happen what happened last time. I can't, I have more than myself to think of. Joey Harrington is out there, I understand with that is some change and new concerns. But I refuse to let this affect me like last time. I can give up a bit of control now and not feel like my world is spinning on its axis. You know?"  
  
Even as she says the words, Sara isn't sure she believes them. She wants to; somehow she thinks if she says it enough she will convince herself. She smiles at Grissom, Sara can't allow him to know she is doubting herself, because that's all they are, doubts. No need to worry him.  
  
She watches as he looks at her carefully, for signs of deception, she suspects. "I am here for you, you know that right? You can talk to me."  
  
"Yeah, I know." She did; she knows he would do anything for her. But at the same time she can't burden him yet, he has enough stress trying to track down Harrington. Sara believes she can convince herself everything is fine.  
  
"Good." Leaning in, he kisses her again, her naked body pressed into him turning him on more than Grissom thought possible, and her being pregnant does nothing to dissuade him. In his biased opinion, Sara is the most beautiful pregnant woman he has ever seen, and he promptly tells her that.  
  
"Thanks Grissom, and remember that in 3 months when I'm complaining about being fat and uncomfortable and don't want anything to do with you." She giggles as he runs his fingertips along her sides.  
  
"I will, and my opinion of your beauty will never change, never." With that he kisses her hard again and she returns the favor, her free hand running down his chest, pushing on the boxers he is wearing.  
  
"Love you Sara."  
  
"Love you too, Gris."  
  
~Of course its not over.where's the fun in that? 


	17. Chapter 17

Title, author, disclaimer, you know the drill.  
  
Notes and thanks: Thank YOU to everyone. Y'all have been SO patient with me and this little project of mine. Here is chapter 17, only 8 more to go.  
  
Grissom wakes to a ringing cell phone and an empty bed. Deciding to take care of the former first he picks up the offending phone and opens it.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Gris?"  
  
"Who else would answer the phone?" he asks tersely looking around for Sara, not seeing her in the bedroom or bathroom. Concerned, he slips out of bed and pulls some pants on.  
  
"Well considering its Sara's phone.maybe Sara?" Nicks voice says lightly, he is not holding his amusement at Grissom in very well.  
  
"Oh, you want to talk to her?" He asks distractedly, walking out of the room and into the long hall that holds the bedrooms.  
  
"That's ok. I wanted to see how she was, I'll talk to her later. Everything ok?"  
  
"Yeah fine. See you tonight." He snaps the phone shut and looks in the last bedroom, finally seeing her standing there. The sunset is streaming through the windows, casting Sara in a glow; making her appear not quite real, like an angel on this earth only a short time. The hairs on the back of his neck stand at attention. Grissom shakes the discomforting feeling that gives him and enters the room, not making a sound, his footsteps quieted on the carpeting.  
  
Approaching her, he finally reaches out and touches her arm, they are both surprised when Sara starts and pulls away from his touch. Her head turns to him quickly, and he sees fear before its quickly replaced by that smile he loves so much.  
  
"Sara?" He takes another step to her, concerned about her reaction, though honestly not that surprised, considering.  
  
"What do you think about this one as the baby's room?" Her eyes dart back to the empty space before returning to his, whatever fear was there, gone.  
  
"That's fine, whatever you want."  
  
She wrinkles her small nose at him. "Its not just my decision Gris. I like this one, has a nice view of the mountains, and its on the back side of the house, closest to us."  
  
"Ok, its settled, this is the room. What made you decide this all of a sudden?" He is beginning to follow her sudden leaps in thinking, this one, however, evades him. Grissom had been warned by Catherine, hormones make you forget a lot of things in addition to making the thoughts you can remember, scattered. He cant picture Sara ever being scattered, but as of late her thoughts do seem to be all over the place, with the exception of work, she's had no trouble there.  
  
"Well we need to paint and get it ready, figured we should at least decide on the room. I wont be able to help much longer." She looks at him and smiles.  
  
"Don't worry, I'll take care of it." He wraps his arms around her, pulling her back into his chest.  
  
"Gris."  
  
"Don't you trust me?"  
  
"Implicitly."  
  
"Then relax." He places on hand on her stomach and she quickly moves it so he can feel the suddenly active baby.  
  
"He knows when we are talking about him." She smiles and feels Grissom return the smile. "Soon Grissom, with the room."  
  
"Sara, we have four months." He starts making lazy circles on her pajama covered skin with his fingers.  
  
"Yeah, still. Soon, please." Her voice has a distant tone and is foreboding, like she knows something he doesn't.  
  
"Sara? What's wrong?" He turns her in his embrace.  
  
"Nothing, except we're hungry. Feed us." She smiles and give him a quick kiss, walking out of the room and into theirs, a few seconds later he hears the shower starting. Giving the room one more look, he starts to formulate a plan in his head and makes a note to talk to Catherine and the guys that night.  
  
Walking into the locker room that night Sara is immediately accosted by Nick.  
  
"Hey, you ok? I didn't get to talk to you yesterday." He leans against the locker next to hers.  
  
"Yeah, I'm ok. It scared me, but I'm over it." She closes the locker and notices the dubious expression on his face. "Really. Why doesn't anyone believe me?"  
  
"I believe you. Just concerned."  
  
"I know, thanks Nicky." Giving him a small smile she moves by to the door.  
  
"Anytime. I don't want anything happening to you or the baby." He quickly catches up to her and wraps an arm around her shoulder, whispering conspiratorially. "You thought of a name yet?"  
  
"Nooo." She draws out, wondering where this is going.  
  
"Huh, I hear Nick is a nice name." With that he releases her and peels off to the restroom. "See you in a minute."  
  
She shakes her head and walks into the break room, grabbing an apple out of the fridge.  
  
"Hey Sara." Catherine greets her.  
  
"Hey."  
  
"I was thinking, you want to go shopping some weekend?"  
  
Sara pauses mid-bite and stares at the older woman, confusion evident on her face. This was the last thing she expected.  
  
"Well, that baby is going to come at some point, and I doubt you have a clue what it needs."  
  
Sara carefully considers that, and while initially is offended, realizes Catherine is right. "K, but shouldn't Grissom come?"  
  
"We can just do a.fact finding mission. You know, I can help you decide what you need and you and Gris can choose a theme later. They have some really cool stuff these days."  
  
"Theme?" Sara turns to Warrick with a helpless look, he had been listening to the conversation from the couch. She hadn't considered that. "Ok, sure."  
  
"Good, we can decide when later."  
  
Sara nods and goes back to eating her apple, the logistics of having a child entering her thoughts for the first time. Her mind overloaded with thoughts of patterns, cribs and other things she has no idea about.  
  
One week later, Sara and Nick are returning from their crime scene, an assault and battery with a missing suspect. They go their separate ways- Nick to drop off blood evidence with Greg, Sara to the print lab. Sitting in the stool, Sara rests her head on the table, exhaustion is a common event for her now, especially after returning from the field. Grissom has told her more than once she can stop going out whenever she wants, but Sara refuses until she simply cant anymore. Sara's personal goal is to at least still go out into the field until she is 32 weeks, maybe further, after that, its all lab work and the occasional picture taking. The feel of cool stainless steel of the counter on her forehead lulls her into a light sleep.  
  
She is aware of little until her dreamless sleep is interrupted by a hand on her shoulder. Starting at the touch, Sara quickly snaps her body up, the back of her head making contact with the desk lamp on the table. She lets out a loud "ouch" before looking at the person the hand is attached too, Sara expects Harrington, but is relieved when Nicks alarmed face comes into focus.  
  
"Sar! Jesus, you ok?"  
  
Rubbing her head Sara fixes him with a glare. "Yeah, fine. Sounded worse than it hurt. Don't sneak up on people like that."  
  
"You were sleeping Sara. What did you want me to do? Sing you a lullaby?" His tone is light, the grin on his face making Sara laugh.  
  
"Yeah, yeah. What did you need?" Pulling her hand away from her scalp, she confirms no blood was spilled.  
  
"Just wanted to let you know that Greggo is running DNA and came to see where you got with that print."  
  
"Print, yeah. Lets see." She turns to the computer screen, surprised to see "Match Found" in red letters. "Bingo, we got.wait a.is this right? This has to be a joke." Her voice cracks slightly on the words.  
  
"What?" Nick asks and finally looks at the screen. "I.your sure you ran the right prints?"  
  
"Yeah, I'm positive. I still remember how to do my job." She makes eye contact with Nick, fear swimming the dark orbs.  
  
"Run it again."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Run it again," he says more slowly. "Maybe it pulled up the last results."  
  
"Fine." Efficiently she runs through the procedure and 3 minutes later the same results are produced. "Harrington," she whispers.  
  
"Yeah, he's our assault suspect."  
  
Several moments of silence are broken by the shrill of Sara's cell phone. She almost jumps out of the chair at the noise. Quickly grabbing it, she answers, answering in the affirmative several times before hanging up. Nick looks at her quizzically.  
  
"I have a package at reception. Delivered a few minutes ago by some kid."  
  
"Lets go."  
  
The walk to the front desk feels more like a death march to Sara than she would have liked. As they approach, Sara's steps slow and she breathes deeply several times to calm her nerves. The receptionist sees her and picks up the innocent envelope, holding it out to her, Sara cringes as she thinks of all the prints the receptionist just put on their potential evidence. Pulling on latex gloves she retrieves the letter, ignoring the odd looks from people standing around.  
  
Returning to layout, she slowly opens the flap, hoping to delay the inevitable. Finally pulling out one sheet of paper, she lays it flat for her and Nick to read. After several moments Nick looks at her and covers one of her shaking hands with his.  
  
"I'm going to get Grissom," he says and quickly pages him. Turning back to Sara, he sees that she is staring at the letter, with a lost expression on her face. Carefully, he runs one hand down her arm, lightly grasps her wrist and pulls her away from the table and in turn, the letter. She is sitting quietly when Grissom enters the room, anxiety marring his face.  
  
"Sara?"  
  
"I'm fine. Read my latest correspondence." She points at the table.  
  
Squeezing her hand, he turns back and reads the words.] 


End file.
